Cervical barriers and BDSM

Reflexions flat spring latex diaphragm preferred by dive-sex professionals

Premature ejaculation in the fetish world: I’m working with my psychiatrist who is treating several of his patients for premature ejaculation. Premature ejaculation (PE) in the vanilla world is annoying and embarrassing to men and frustrating to their women partners during recreational sex, but it doesn’t affect their fertility. If he is erect and can get it in before getting off he’s a success at procreational sex. In the fetish world where Viagra, Cialis and Lavitra are consumed like breath mints by males of all ages the inability to control the ejaculation reflex and retain an erection for extended intervals, even with a cock ring, can be a psychologically crippling condition and will affect a man’s standing with women while competing for the most desirable females.

Rather than medicate them with anti-depressants which make it more time consuming for some men to reach orgasm my psychiatrist is trying to have these patients become so used to visual erotic stimuli - in the form of a rubber-girl masturbating - that they can begin to regain control of their ejaculations. I wear a black latex catsuit with a hood that hides my features so I can’t be identified, ballet boots and special black latex exam gloves. I speak very little during a 25 minute session with each patient though I do gasp, mew, moan, whimper and occasionally scream while using my fingers or a dildo to give myself orgasms. The object for the patient is to be able to go the full 25 minutes w/o ejaculating while he watches me masturbate to multiple orgasms.

I wear an Oves cap (my secret) and then ‘double bag’ for safety (in case I’m overpowered during the session and the patient pulls my diaphragm out – see ‘BDSM and cervical barriers’ below) while letting the patient watch me insert a Reflexions (latex) diaphragm in case the patient loses control and mounts, penetrates and ejaculates inside me. In which case we begin again and a second occurrence of that behavior and the Doctor bills the patient $500 for each time I’m mounted. Having a guy drop $1,000 in less than 25 minutes usually focuses a patients mind. All sessions are videoed so there are no billing disputes. For my own safety I insist that all the patients I perform ‘erotic therapy’ with have been recently tested for STIs and are clean before I begin treatment since, as I mentioned, it is not unknown for men to lose control and mount their erotic therapist though it’s far more common to get splattered with semen, especially during the early sessions of a patients treatment.

One reason I wear black latex is that fresh milky white semen splatters show up well on a black background for the video. I wear a splatter mask, a pair of oversized contact lenses, to minimize the chances of getting semen in my eyes (it burns) since some patients have amazing force behind the first three or four ejaculations of semen. I’ve treated four patients so far and three have shown substantial increases in ejaculatory control by being able to go the entire 25 minute session w/o spilling seed after only 5 treatments each.

Many of these patients have wives and young children and had begun experimenting with fetishes to try and correct their inability to perform sexually at the level their wives require, so in addition to our therapy sessions I try to help the patients with tips about what to do to improve their standing at home. At the end of a successful session I allow the patient to mount and get off inside me (a non billable orgasm for the patient) or if he insists I’ll blow him. But then I give him a deep kiss and spit his semen back into his mouth and force him to swallow it. After that I’m not asked for any more blow jobs by that patient. I prefer to be mounted since I enjoy being able to have that much control over a partner and love having a man’s semen draining into my thong. I also like being able to release the patient’s tension after a difficult 25 minutes and taking him for my own pleasure gives me a feeling of accomplishment as well as feeling sated and confident after mutually orgasmic sex.

Cervical barriers and BDSM: A group of young Rubber Sluts (a rank in the local BDSM community that has nothing to do with a woman’s moral character) have asked me to give several seminars on the advantages and disadvantages of using a cervical barrier in the BDSM community. Almost everyone involved in dive-sex out here knows by now that wearing a gas guard during dive-sex is important for a woman’s safety but the choice of which barrier to use and the benefits and drawbacks of diaphragm vs. cap is not always clear. They felt the need for the class became obvious after there were several incidents involving local women in BDSM clubs that put women’s lives at risk. I offered to hold the classes for their entire club membership, but they wanted a private meeting rather than having their Masters or Doms present so they could ask as many personal questions as possible w/o feeling controlled by males.

Reflexions diaphragm: FemCaps and Reflexions flat spring diaphragms are the barriers of choice with the Reflexions far more often used because it is capable of providing a better fit, is less likely to be uncomfortable for a male partner regardless of his size, is nearly impossible for a male partner to under-thrust the rim, can being worn for protection at any time in a woman’s cycle and – unlike most silicone barriers - can be used safely with silicone intimate lubes (like DiveGel) during dive-sex. And the latex dome is stretchier and transmits heat better than silicone so it is almost like skin-on-skin contact. The only possible down-side to wearing the Reflexions is if the woman has a latex allergy. Latex cervical barriers are more easily damaged by oily meds and lubes than are silicone ones, but with proper care a latex diaphragm should last a year or perhaps two even in frequent use. Other diaphragms made of silicone like the Ortho All-Flex and Milex Arcing spring and Omniflex are more easily under-thrust and can be destroyed not only by oily meds and lubes, but also by silicone lubes used with them and silicone lubes are an important part of dive-sex safety.

FemCap: The FemCap is far less effective than a diaphragm as a contraceptive device primarily because of the small number of sizes available (three) which means that fewer women using it can get a really good fit. And the removal strap can often hurt a partner especially in positions where deep thrusting occurs. However, in the BDSM community the FemCap is very dangerous because it can be so easily misused; pulled out of the woman’s vagina before penetration and either used as a butt plug where the diameter of the cap with the man in her vagina gives her the discomfort of double penetration and the possibility of having to go to an ER to have it removed if her Dom/Master hadn’t tied a cord to the removal strap so he could retrieve it.

However, far worse from a safety standpoint, is to have the FemCap stuffed in her mouth as a gag. And I don’t mean from the bitter chemical taste of spermicide. Using FemCap as a gag is extremely dangerous and has resulted in brain damage from asphyxia when the cap was shoved too far down the woman’s throat and blocked her airway and the Dom/Master hadn’t pulled it out in time with a cord tied to the removal strap. If the removal strap is cut off there is nowhere to attach the cord and a strapless FemCap shoved down a woman’s throat will almost certainly lead to her suffocation. I recommend that FemCap not be worn by women in a BDSM relationship because of the possibility of and danger associated with its misuse. A latex Reflexions diaphragm is far safer and more effective device for dive-sex and is less likely to be misused by the wearer’s partner. To the extent that the Dom/Masters are predisposed to latex over silicone I try to steer the Rubber-Sluts toward using the Reflexions diaphragm for protection during dive sex and for other more vanilla uses in their lives.