Lesbian sex, masturbation and the contraceptive diaphragm

Grishko Ulanova I pointes and Milex arcing spring diaphragm folded for insertion

The Photo: A Milex arcing spring diaphragm folded for insertion. Unlike the Ortho All-Flex arcing spring rim the Milex arcing spring has two elbow hinges that must be folded by griping the rim at two specific spots.

Masturbation and the diaphragm: Masturbation: The excitation of one's own or another's genital organs, usually to orgasm, by manual contact or means other than sexual intercourse. (The American Heritage® Stedman's Medical Dictionary) In some masturbation situations a diaphragm can act as an upper reproductive tract protection device.

Veronika’s friends: Returning readers will remember Veronika is Alexi’s daughter, and my first ‘pelvic protégé’ in the UK, who dances with a major international ballet Co located here in London. I am currently schooling her in the pelvic skills needed for success as a ballet escort. She is friends with a gorgeous 22 y/o soloist (I’ll call her April) with a lovely Balanchine body who is a heart-breaker for the straight men in the company because of her looks and the fact that she is a femme lesbian with a butch partner (who I’ll call Willamina or Will) who owns her own cosmetics company. They met at a party for major ballet donors and April said it was love at first sight for her.

April taking SCUBA lessons: Will has an indoor heated pool at her place in Chelsea where she is having April take SCUBA lessons and will eventually graduate to a OTS Guardian FFM for dive-sex.                      

Veronika referred the couple to our clinic because they want to try underwater penetrative sex with a strap-on and dildo and need diaphragms for ‘flood insurance’ to minimize the possibility of PID as April wants to become pregnant and have a baby when her career ends. Will is in her late 30s tall and slim with lovely legs, muscular shoulders and just the right amount of androgyny to be an extremely striking woman. Will and April make a gorgeous couple and turn heads wherever they go.

The Milex Arcing spring for use by lesbians: Both Will and April had our clinic’s standard baseline full pelvic workups and full panel STI tests and hCG tests came back negative. Neither Will nor April had been using contraceptives of any kind – other than condoms to sheathe penetrative toys to protect against STI transmission - as they don’t have sex with men. Both have had the full series of three Gardasil shots even though Will is outside the recommended age bracket since even though they are monogamous getting an STI from lesbian sex is a possibility and rape is too for women in sexually adventuresome lifestyles and additional vaccine coverage can’t hurt. 

I fitted Both Will and April with Milex Arcing spring diaphragms to be worn ‘dry’ (w/o spermicide) for ‘flood insurance’ since while April will generally be the one penetrated Will wanted to be fitted so she too can experience using a strap-on or dildo underwater. Returning readers will recall that the vagina will often flood during underwater penetrative sex depending on the position of the vagina while being thrust into. So just as with a penis the hydraulic pressure created by thrusting a tight fitting strap-on or dildo into a flooded vagina could force water through an unprotected cervix into the woman’s uterus causing PID and possibly infertility. Additionally the dome of a diaphragm provides some thrust buffering should the partner wielding the strap-on or dildo lack skill in thrusting into her partner.

Hence the need for a lesbian who anticipates underwater penetrative sex to have her cervix protected. The Milex arcing spring is the best choice since there will be little likelihood of the rim being under-thrust and no tactile penis diaphragm interaction and the stiffer silicone dome is more rugged and better suited to take thrusts from hard sex toys like strap-ons and dildos than is the stretchy latex dome of a Reflexions.

Both Will and April were very excited about being fitted with Milex arcing spring diaphragms and I gave them both an opportunity to practice insertion and removal so they can check that the dome is covering the cervix and cautioned to indert before arousal as when aroused the vagina tents, lengthens, and makes proper insertion to cover the cervix difficult and sometimes impossible.

Lesbians, a niche market for Milex diaphragms: I’m thinking that since Will is very active in the Lesbian community a trend setter and an early adopter of social trends our clinic may see an increase in Milex fittings among lesbians as followers want to participate in the latest trend in sexual protection. While very few lesbian couples have access to a pool for SCUBA sex many do have access to hot tubs in which the vagina can flood during penetrative sex

As with my Lesbian friends I also use a Milex Arcing spring - it has the same spring strength as the Reflexions flat spring - as upper reproductive tract protection when a man is not available and I crave sex in a hostile environment and dive solo to masturbate underwater with a dildo (well lubed with DiveGel+) in my pool in the basement of Blackthorn house. The dive pool is about sixteen feet deep and I hold myself on the bottom with a Velcro closure ankle leash. Stimulating myself to orgasm while sucking gas can be awesome when I’m urgently in need of kinky release!

British Summer Time: In the UK the clocks go forward 1 hour at 1am on the last Sunday in March, (3-29) and back 1 hour at 2am on the last Sunday in October, (10-25). The period when the clocks are 1 hour ahead is called British Summer Time (BST). There's more daylight in the evenings and less in the mornings (sometimes called Daylight Saving Time).

Lesbians and dive-asphyxia training

A Femme’s last breath after air is denied

Lesbians and dive-asphyxia training: Rarely will a lesbian student couple want to take a dive-asphyxia course, but I have a student couple in training now. They are in my Advanced Sexual Techniques course at St Lucy’s and are fascinated by techniques that heighten a dive-sex experience. Lesbian training begins by having the woman fitted for a full face mask, gas guard and a strap-on. You don’t hear a lot about sizing a strap-on, but it is a very important part of the process of kitting a student out. Having it correctly sized for her anatomy lessens the likelihood that rough thrusting will rupture her uterus. Training strap-ons are made of rigid silicone with a softer replaceable tip to protect the cervix of the women it is being used on. And a FemCap is the gas guard of choice because it provides more thrust buffering of the strap-on for the Femme’s cervix than a diaphragm.

Pointe training: A requirement of asphyxia students is that they have had a minimum of 4 years of pointe training. Prior pointe training as a requirement is generally thought to be used to decrease the number of student applications by selecting out the women who aren’t in the best physical condition, however that’s not entirely true. The need for pointe is because an asphyxia student is first trained by being penetrated on her toes in a ballet studio while wearing her FFM to build up her stamina. All asphyxia students are fitted with Gaynor Minden pointes because with the internally padded polymer toe boxes and pre-arched polymer shanks Gaynors can be precision fitted to provide maximum support while still requiring the effort of a traditional pointe shoe. In addition, Gaynors are well accepted by both Butch and Femme which is not the case with ballet boots. Ballet boots are not permitted because they don’t cause the wearer to work nearly as hard to stay safely balanced on her platforms as pointe shoes do and we have found the women who wear pointes for their early asphyxia training are far more successful at managing the difficulties associated with breath control than those who wore ballet boots so ballet boots are no longer approved footwear for asphyxia training. Other schools will allow the use of ballet boots, but it just seems to us that a woman who wants to wear ballet boots for our asphyxia course isn’t interested in putting out the effort we think the course requires.

Inverted tank set: Wearing an inverted tank is the preferred tank configuration during asphyxia training because it is easier for a Butch to shut off her Femme’s air while penetrating her doggie style with a strap-on when the valve is where she can easily reach it. And, an inverted tank is more of a challenge for the Femme trainee to reach the valve on her tank to turn her air back on herself if that becomes necessary. Our couples training is symmetrical to ensure that both the Butch and Femme get to be penetrated and use a strap-on so they understand what and how their partner is feeling. After the couple has practiced having their air shut off and turning it back on themselves so they are confident that they can do it on shallow water test dives we have the girls dive in a 20 ft deep training pool wearing gas guards and dive-gel for actual penetrative sex while their air is shut off. Traditionally a female trainer goes into the pool and down on training dives to demonstrate and to provide correction to the couple.

The male option: With lesbian asphyxia training we also offer an option for unprotected penetration by a male trainer. That option is very popular, which I found surprising but my psychiatrist says it is a chance for them to experience an orgasm with a man in a controlled environment w/o risking a heterosexual social encounter among the general population and any responsibilities that might involve. It’s a way to safely experiment with heterosexuality; like having a female trainer masturbate a Het-chick in asphyxia training (an option we also offer) so the student can experience a Bi-encounter. Interestingly, there is a rather high rate of unintended pregnancies of lesbians who chose unprotected penetration by a male trainer. The women are aware of that when they select the option and chose it anyway since it gives them a guilt free encounter with a man. However, there is another reason for its popularity. A Butch often encourages her Femme to choose it because the risk of pregnancy is so high – about 23% even when they are using a gas guard – it reinforces the stereotype of men causing women nothing but trouble, a mindset that Dykes and Butches want to encourage among their Femmes because it is the Femmes who men are constantly chasing and who therefore are at greatest risk of at least turning Bi thus significantly lessening the emotional hold of her ‘Husband’.