Vegas vaginas and the contraceptive sponge

A Today vaginal contraceptive sponge

The photo: The Today vaginal contraceptive sponge hanging from an orchid by its ribbon removal loop. Today is a soft, disposable polyurethane foam sponge containing 1000 mg of the spermicide Nonoxynol 9 (N9) and is slightly less than two inches in diameter. The Today sponge while recommended for only 24 hours of continuous wear was originally approved for a 48 hour continuous wearing interval. However, wearing a sponge continuously makes it more likely that the wearer may become allergic to the N9 spermicide and that the sponge will develop an odor. The concave side fits over the cervix and the manufacture says it is effective protection for an unlimited number of acts of intercourse during the approved wearing interval making it ideal for a teen get-away weekend with a spongeworthy man..

Sponge pregnancies: For women who have given birth the contraceptive sponge failure rate is very high (20%) even when used perfectly so is not a good alternative. However, for a young woman who hasn’t been pregnant and has the willpower to use it consistently and correctly the Today vaginal contraceptive sponge can be an attractive birth control alternative if hormonal contraceptives; diaphragms and caps or a LARC method do not suit in her circumstances.  Walmart currently has a three count box advertised for less than eleven USD or about $3.33 each for 48 continuous hours of protection which is pretty good if you are going on a very spontaneous weekend with a new love interest. Of course it provides no STI protection, but does offer some thrust buffering if the man is large and frequently hits the cervix and it is readily available in most pharmacies w/o an Rx.

Bea has had some St Lucy’s girls to our home for weekend sleepovers with escort trainees for entertainment as an ice breaker for new girls entering the prep school during the spring semester. I was surprised to learn that several of the new girls, all Bea’s age, were using the sponge for protection.  There is no danger of contracting STIs on the sleepovers as the escorts and students have all been screened, but the likelihood of them using the sponge correctly at that age isn’t very good. So I made sure they all took the EC pill ella before they left for school the following Monday.  There is some risk but it was a major bonding experience for everyone involved. And I talked with their sexual health counselor at school to see if the girls can’t be convinced to switch to IUDs.

The sponge’s effectiveness: Source: Trussell J. Contraceptive efficacy. In Hatcher RA, Trussell J, Stewart F, Nelson A, Cates W, Guest F, Kowal D. Contraceptive Technology: Eighteenth Revised Edition. New York NY: Ardent Media, 2004.

Failures (unplanned pregnancies) per 100 women during the first year of use.

Parous women     Typical use (not always consistently or correctly) 32%         

      Perfect use (Always used consistently and correctly) 20%

Nulliparous women    Typical use (not always consistently or correctly) 16%         

 Perfect use (Always used consistently and correctly) 9%

Proper use means thoroughly wetting the Today Sponge with tap water before insertion, leaving it in place for six hours after the last act of intercourse, and having it in place every time intercourse occurs. The Today contraceptive sponge does not protect against STIs and should not be used during the woman’s menstrual period or for contraceptive protection during underwater sex. However, it is said to be safe to wear during bathing and while swimming.

Vegas vaginas and the contraceptive sponge: We are seeing a spike in sponge pregnancies coming in to our clinic for blood tests and terminations. That seems to be related to holiday (three day) weekends where the users are trying to stretch a single sponge to a continuous wearing interval of three days, 72 hours. Assuming that all other requirements had been met that leaves them in uncharted territory (as far as the sponges efficacy goes) for the last 24 hours and they are far more likely to have an allergic reaction to the continuous N9 released against delicate vaginal tissue. The scent of a sponge left inserted for three days is pretty ripe, but that is just from the interaction of the polyurethane foam with the wearer’s natural secretions and her partner(s) semen a reaction that occurs with diaphragms and cervical caps left inserted for too long as well.

Birth control hormones, copper IUDs and divorce: Our clinic is beginning to see a pattern in some patients who were recently married (in the past three years), who had been on hormonal contraceptives since their teens and who had come off hormones to get pregnant. The pattern is that the women are coming in for a ParaGard copper IUD before conceiving and having the strings removed so their husbands can’t tell they have An IUD inserted.

I’ve spoken to several of them and they have a common story; that when they came of contraceptive hormones each found they had married the wrong man, meaning that he wasn’t masculine enough for her. All are preparing themselves to divorce their husbands and while hormone free are searching for a more masculine and ruggedly compatible man. I’m not saying this is common, but it does fit with a study that was published last year which found that women who met their partners while they were on hormonal contraceptives chose less masculine men than those who were cycling naturally.    

 

 

Callisto

Jupiter as Diana seduces Callisto

The photo: Jupiter and Callisto by Francois Boucher oil on canvas. Dimensions: 72 x 98 cm, completed in 1744. It’s in the Pushkin Museum of Fine Art, Moscow, Russia. In Greek mythology Callisto (or Kallisto) was a nymph of Artemis. Transformed by Zeus into a bear and set among the stars, she was the bear-mother of the Arcadians, through her son Arcas.

Fitting the enemy: Guess whose legs were in the stirrups on my exam table a few days ago? She is new to the clinic and rather than being randomly assigned to me had asked for me specifically, which aroused my curiosity as I know most of the women who have asked to be fitted by me. They are either existing patients or referrals from friends and are on my schedule well in advance. She was a walk-in and amazingly I had a cancellation. Her name is Callisto, from Greek Mythology, and she is gorgeous 5’9” raven haired ex-dancer though too tall for classical ballet. She works as a project manager for a well known aerospace company that recently got a large contract at the RPV (remotely piloted vehicle - drone) control base north of town. She came in for an annual pelvic and to check the fit of an old latex Ortho All-Flex that she was fitted for in 2007. She is currently using the single rod implant Implanon the 3 year effectiveness of which is due to expire next month. She said she is planning to start a family soon so wants to go back to using a diaphragm and spermicide combination to allow time for her natural cycles to resume and stabilize before she tries to conceive.

I fit her with a 70mm All-Flex as she said she isn’t into fetish sex for which Reflexions would have been a better choice and suggested she use ContraGel, a natural ingredients spermicide that uses lactic acid as the active ingredient. Blushing, she also asked what I would advise for pelvic muscle toning. So I suggested two sets of Ben Wa balls. The first a set of individual 1.0 inch Pyrex glass balls each weighing .65 oz as a starter set as she was rather tight to begin with and then a set of .75 inch chrome steel balls each weighing 1.0 oz. once she can manipulate the Pyrex set confidently and won’t expel them if she coughs or sneezes. She bought both at the clinic’s toning boutique before she left.

We seemed to be getting along well and at the end of her fitting as she dressed she said “You don’t know who I am, do you?” That caught me off guard and I said, “I know only what you’ve put in your medical record and told me about yourself.” To which she replied, “I’m Brian’s wife.” And my day had been going so well up to that point! She was my last patient of the day and I had planned to spend several hours window-shopping the Spring fashions, but she asked if I had time to talk and since she appeared to have her emotions under control and her clutch was too small to conceal a gun I thought since I’m fucking her husband why not listen to what she has to say. So I asked if she would like to go with me to Panera (the bread place) on West Lake Mead Blvd, where they have wonderful salads and she followed me in her rental. I love their French bread and with my metabolism I can get away with eating a lot of it with Boars Head roast beef, lettuce and tomato as a filling.

Over coffee and a salad at Panera she told me why she had tracked me down. She and Brian have been married for 6 years and she had known for the last three that he was having affairs with some of his former ballet students while touring schools auditioning new students. She said she wants children and Brian does not and her biological clock is ticking. She has found a young widower, her boss (who Brian had told me was married) who loves her and has asked her to marry him and she intends to divorce Brian.

Pillow talk: She said she wondered what I was like, since he has talked about me in his sleep and has even mentioned me and my success as a dancer to her while in bed together and how tight my grip is. I thought my face was on fire I was blushing so badly. Here I am sitting across the table from a woman whose husband is fucking me every chance he gets and she’s telling me he has compared her vaginal grip to mine and he told her I’m much tighter. Which she said is why she asked me how she could tone her muscles to increase her grip. She asked if I was seriously interested in Brian as a husband because he would be available soon. We both agreed that while he is a truly fantastic lover and sex with him is awesome, neither of us wants him as a husband. However, we both want to continue having sex with him, at least for now. We agreed to keep in touch and strange as it may seem I think we parted friends.

No-fault divorce: She’s going to file for divorce in California, which is a no-fault state, citing irreconcilable differences as the reason. The earliest she can expect the court to grant the divorce is six months and she intends to settle with Brian well ahead of that so that she should be free to marry again some time in the fall. She has had a private investigator photographing his assignations for the past few months and thinks he will settle quickly if she agrees to keep his serial infidelities from becoming public knowledge, which would destroy his career. Fortunately she doesn’t seem to know about his fondness for the private coaching sessions with selected student ‘muses’. She has already broached the subject of divorce with Brian which may explain why he seems to have become extremely attentive to my needs while still fucking as many of his ‘muses’ as I will allow him access to.

The Rite of Spring: Jack was here for the ceremony of planting the first seeds of Spring to celebrate the Vernal Equinox on March 20th, which he did with me having an Oves screwed down tight on my ripe cervix because I was CD13 and ovulated the next day. It was a quiet gathering of like minded friends. After the ceremony we feasted on venison steaks and mead. Not a typical modern western U.S. breakfast, though ham and eggs were available. The venison (Red Deer Jack killed on his father’s estate, aged and shipped in especially for the occasion) and mead linked us to the ancients in whose footsteps we follow.

Spring break and viruses: UNLV is on Spring Break this week and Mumps is on campus and at St Lucy’s as well. The two shot combination measles-mumps-rubella (MMR) vaccine is about 88% effective. So even though all our students have been vaccinated Mumps has infected a few girls at St Lucy’s and they have been quarantined because of potentially serious side effects if an adult gets Mumps. The incubation time is about three weeks so it will take a while for the virus to work its way through vulnerable students and faculty. Fortunately I had Mumps after getting the vaccine when I six and living with my parents in Southwest Virginia so I’m not likely to get it again.

Mouthpiece lipstick

Twin hose mouthpiece with diver’s lipstick

Shelly’s rival's lipstick: I’ll have to publicly admit defeat. I have been unable to focus Rubberstud, Shelly’s husband’s attention back on her as I’d hoped to do. I have however created in Shelly a rubbergirl of the most lascivious sort. She is absolutely drop dead gorgeous encased in latex! The problem with Rubberstud, or perhaps it’s Shelly’s and my problem with him, is that as far as women are concerned as soon as he completes one conquest he is off in another woman’s pants, if not before. We toned her vaginals and improved her technique to appeal to him, and she even let him think she became a rubbergirl just for him, but we couldn’t get him to focus exclusively on Shelly. Actually he was constantly sniffing my crotch until I cut him off after I unexpectedly came into a good bit of money a few weeks back. I’m thinking medicating him on Adderall might be the only solution and we can’t do that. So it was disappointing and surprising when Shelly found lipstick on the mouthpiece of a twin hose SCUBA set she and her husband have at their home’s pool for guests. Always in the past Rubberstud had been careful to do a fairly thorough job of hiding his women even when he brought them home. So this openness in flaunting his liaison with his Mistress in Shelly’s home was an escalation of the schism in their marriage

Evidence of an assignation: In addition to the lipstick on the mouthpiece (not Shelly’s shade) the tank and mask his paramour had worn had her hair conditioner all over them too. Worse was the fact that the white beavertail wetsuit the woman had worn was left on the dressing room bench where she had taken it off with a puddle of dive-gel and coital discharge still in the crotch along with an Ortho diaphragm she had used as a gas guard that had dried blood in the dome and was lying on the beavertail. I was with her when Shelly came across her latest rivals spore where it was obviously meant to be found and I could see the smile on her face when she saw the blood in the dome of the Ortho, as she said “well at least he made the bitch bleed for him”. She also showed me a fresh gouge in the hardwood floor of the master bedroom entryway and smear of black wax on the bedroom rug where someone had slipped and fallen while wearing ballet boots. Shelly hasn’t fallen in her ballet boots since the second day she had them which was months ago before they bought this house. And Rubberstud doesn’t wear his fetishwear – he is actually quite good in ballet boots - except when away from home so it wasn’t him. This isn’t the first or even the third she has seen evidence of his having sex with women in their house, but it is certainly the first time that no attempt was made to hide it. Rubberstud is on business in the Caribbean for ten or twelve days so she has some time to decide how to handle the situation before he returns. She was past being angry; angry was several weeks ago, and she seemed more resigned at that point. She just left the woman’s filthy dive gear where it lay and let the body fluids harden and discolor the rubber.

Legalities: She said she had checked with a lawyer and Rubberstud has her tied up in a prenuptial agreement for another 4 years so right now she thinks she will just try and ride it out if she can. Unless he divorced her, which if that was to happen he would have to settle several hundred million on her to get the divorce and that doesn’t seem likely. Then, over coffee she told me about finding a pack of her latest rival’s birth control pills in an overnight bag hidden in a guest room closet at the far end of the house where Rubberstud thought Shelly never went. She said she took the plastic circle of pills out of the dial pack and put them in the microwave for 15 seconds to fry the hormones, then returned the pills to the dial pack. She wondered if the blood in the dome of the diaphragm could be a hormonal thing from having her pills nuked or if it was from having her cervix battered. I’m wondering if Shelly doesn’t need to go and talk with a therapist because she seems to be obsessing over the strangest things right now. Like the lipstick on the twin hoses reg wasn’t her shade and since she doesn’t use conditioner when she dives she wonders now if she should switch to that shade of lip-gloss and start using a conditioner.