Heretical sects & texts

The narthex of the temple in which lies the Chalice

The Holy Grail: J “Quest for the holy grail. Is that the orgasm or coitus? I would argue for the fetish sensibility it is the orgasm and coitus is only one means to achieve it. Admittedly for the male and probably the females out there 99.999% of orgasms are associated with some sort of physical contact with the erogenous zones. The basic ones are well understood, the vagina, clitoris, G spot, glans, shaft testes, nipples, prostate and so forth. Some have sensitive ears, necks, lips, feet and even their hair can evoke and erotic response. This is not what is at the core of fetish even though we see fetish as manifested in "gear" which exists in the physical world. A fetish ONLY has erotic power to those who "believe in it" or who imbue those "things" with sexual power. Put a rubber suit on a non fetishists and they might say it feels fine, or tight or too tight, or smelly or too slippery… or too something for them to be comfortable. And if they DO not find it uncomfortable they STILL might not find it arouses them sexually. Some might find it does and they would be candidates for becoming a fetishist... someone who finds inanimate things sexually arousing. Of course we all know that the arousal phase is the beginning of the human sexual response. It's the part of the sexual response which gives us an increasing itch to reach the goal post - orgasm. For many "traditionalists" the orgasm is closely linked with cock in pussy fucking and we all know there are scores of "positions" to have cock in pussy sex. Some need that sort of variety and some claim and rightfully so, some position offer better and different experiences and orgasms. But everyone seems to think that there are better and bigger and longer lasting and deeper orgasms and it’s a matter of skill which can tease them out. And a corollary is that there is no limit and more, better, longer, deeper and multiple is out there to conquer.”

The Chalice as an object of desire: “Quest for the holy grail. Is that the orgasm or coitus?” Actually, I had included some apocryphal (and heretical) Christian beliefs in that that thought… hoping you might eventually go there.

After survival, nature’s most powerful drive is the need to reproduce. That biological imperative gives women the ability to cloud men’s minds with lust, mesmerizing the male in more advanced societies into clothing her in exotic materials and bindings in an effort to have his way with her sometimes by bizarre means. Sampling for himself the delights found in the depths of her body he enters the kingdom of heaven on earth to plant his seed at the base of the Holy Grail itself, her uterus, from which all human life springs.

It is understandable that for some early Christians desperate to increase their numbers the uterus was seen as the Holy Grail – from which all life springs - and worship of the female is not a new concept. However, worship of a female God or Goddess was suppressed by the Romans bringing organization to the early Christian church by standardizing its teachings to reflect the views of a male dominated society, probably during or around the time of the First Council of Nicaea a council of Christian bishops convened by the Roman Emperor Constantine I in A.D. 325. The Council was the first effort to attain consensus in the church through an assembly representing all of Christendom. Its main accomplishments were settlement of the issue of the relationship of Jesus to God the Father; the construction of the first part of the Nicene Creed; settling the calculation of the date of Easter; and promulgation of early canon law. In the process early Gospels chronicling worship of the Virgin Mary and glorifying her womb were discarded. Texts of early variant teachings and sects believing in them were suppressed and branded as heretical.

The Idea of the Chalice or Holy Grail (the cup from which Jesus and the apostles drank during the Last Supper) as representing the uterus was most recently brought to the attention of the general public when the concept was used as the basis for The Da Vinci Code the 2003 mystery-detective novel written by Dan Brown. It is the male's biologically driven fascination with women’s reproductive anatomy that has fueled violence and bloodshed since mankind crawled out of the slime and women began seducing men for mates.

Getting mine: J “Sex as a selfish act (which it demonstrably is) involves getting "yours" the way you like it... so to speak. And when there's a partner involved it may be getting THEM to giving you "yours" the way you like it. There are a few strategies here. One is simply to demand it and say... here you play this fiddle called my sexual response. Your role is to learn what I teach and follow the script with finesse. Your reward can be I can do you at another time, or maybe at the same time, or you can learn to "get off" on playing me my way. Wouldn't that be dandy! Another is the quid pro quo where the provider is paid or obligated to perform to spec... the hooker, escort, pro Domme and so forth. You can also "train" or manipulate the partner to do your bidding by positive and negative reinforcements - training. People and animals are easy to train this way. Yet there are times when the partners interactions naturally leads to them each giving and getting exactly what floats their own boats. It doesn't get any better than that. Jane like John to ram her hard in rough almost brutal sex and John gets off on the idea of brutally taking a female! This can apply to any aspect of fetish play... and is what lovers seek in their partners - compatibility. Sure you can wear a rubber suit to please my eye... but I am looking for the women who is turned on by wearing the rubber suit - then she's really sexy to me... the rubberist male might say. But I digress”

“The Holy Grail is not the vagina but the tactile experience of the vagina on a penis for a male and the feeling of the thrusting penis inside her vagina for a female. This is so because vaginas and penises are where the physical sensations which offer up orgasms come from. Some men can get off and prefer an anal cavity. Some a rubber cavity of a sex doll. Some women prefer or are fine with a glass or rubber dildo or even a cucumber to fill their vaginas. Fetish sex is about the toys as substitute for the "real thing". But fetish sex, like vanilla sex is about getting off, but with more emphasis on the arousal phase... lots more. It makes the arousal phase include all sorts of gear and clothing... the mental constructs to eroticize them.”

Suppressed Symbolism: I agree that the vagina is not the Holy Grail. But as I mentioned above I think “the tactile experience of the vagina on a penis for a male and the feeling of the thrusting penis inside her vagina for a female” is not the Holy Grail either. I believe the Apostles drinking from the cup during the Last Supper, pledging they would continue his teachings when Jesus had gone was seen by some early Christians (who worshiped Mary as a deity) to be analogous to or symbolic of sexual intercourse with the transfer of semen (as the blood) which actually fills the Chalice or Holy Grail – the uterus – to continue the faith and mankind. This view of communion in the Catholic Church as celebrating sexual intercourse has been suppressed for nearly 2,000 years, but for believers traces of it can still be seen in the ritual of the Mass, performed by celibate priests.

The genitals as a fetish: J “I suppose some people have a genital fetish and literally eroticize the facsimiles of genitals. This I suppose is manifest in silicone breast augmentation, but surgical and applied on top of one's own breasts, or rubber vulvas and vaginas which can be worn as garments, some with sheathed cavities to penetrate... mostly used by CDs I suppose. But it's conceivable that a female could have a fetish of being fucked with a fake pussy she wears. And the same might apply to a male who sports a fake cock over his own. And there certainly could be females who desire large rubber cocks more so than the real deal. However these sorts of appliances are more about the actual fucking than the arousal the way most fetishes operate. Fetish is mostly about getting there as opposed to being there and so the Holy Grail is really about the QUEST for it than FOR it. What do I know?”

Cervical barriers as a fetish: I don’t know any women who have a genital fetish, but I know some CD/TVs who do. I’ve written about some few rubberists both male and female who are into ‘vaginal rubber’, an oft overlooked area for the female rubberist, and the different pleasures that can be derived from its use. As returning readers know I wear a cervical barrier to protect my upper reproductive tract. I’m CD24 today and have an Oves cervical cap sucking on my cervix as a gas-guard for dive-sex and as a contraceptive barrier although I’m in my Luteal phase with my menses starting next Friday so I’ve ovulated this cycle and as far as contraception is concerned I could go w/o protection and still be safe. For me contraceptive diaphragms and cervical caps are a huge turn-on. I love the added confidence that I get when I have a physical barrier protecting my cervix even though it may be a tiny bit of .2mm thick transparent silicone rubber.

Ever since I was in my early 20s and got my first latex Prentif cavity rim cervical cap I’ve been in love with cervical barriers for contraception. I was on the pill and hated what the progestin did to me, killing my libido and drying me out so that even on the rare instances when I wanted sex I could never get comfortable regardless of which or how much lube I used. Today less than one percent of U.S women use a cervical barrier and most doctors aren’t taught how to fit them anymore. Women’s doctors are in the pocket of Big Pharma and pushing hormones these days saying cervical barriers aren’t nearly as effective. But for a motivated woman who follows all the rules all the time and who has a properly fitted diaphragm that is correctly inserted the device is more than 96% effective which is as good as the protection most women get from their pills because they aren’t compliant in taking them.

NWU has live sex demo – Pt II

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Toni Bentley reviews Black Swan

Natalie Portman in “Black Swan.”

“The movie provides the most recent -- though most egregious -- example of the “ballerinas-are-victims” stance that certain good Samaritans love to embrace,” writes Toni Bentley,

Why I posted this review: I admire Toni Bentley immensely for her knowledge of ballet and her ability to translate that knowledge into words on paper which make her books fascinating reading. So it is with sadness, but understanding, that I read her unfavorable review of the film Black Swan.

Dancers are very self-critical always seeing flaws in their own performances and trying to improve and that hyper-criticality will sometimes spill over to their non-dance lives. I have some dancer friends who are unable to relax and enjoy a dance performance from the audience. They are continually watching for missteps, errors of commission or omission by the performers, to the extent that they can’t enjoy the performance. I think for many dancers who didn’t like Black Swan, that is what has happened. In critiques you read: Portman isn’t a ballerina… No one who only trained for a year can adequately portray a body that has been trained for 15 years… There is not enough dance… Most dance scenes were shot from the waist up… Ballet isn’t all rabid ballet moms, bloody toes, eating disorders and predatory Artistic Directors. But no one denies that these things exist in ballet and many dancers and devoted ballet fans dislike having that pointed out in a popular film. And many hate the idea of using the duality of Odette / Odile in Swan Lake as the frame story on which to hang a dramatic psycho-thriller of a dancer going insane. Toni Bentley wanted an entirely different film and she didn’t get it. Even so, I think this review is worth reading. I am indebted to J for bringing this review to my attention.

THE DAILY BEAST

Butchery at the Ballet
by Toni Bentley
February 25, 2011 8:48pm

“Oscar and audiences may love Black Swan, but one former New York City Ballet dancer thinks it’s nothing more than “balletploitation.” Author Toni Bentley explains why Darren Aronofsky’s psychological thriller is insultingly off pointe.

I have tried to avoid writing about Darren Aronofsky’s pirouetting parody Black Swan, but, having been a professional ballet dancer for George Balanchine, I keep getting asked what I think of the movie. And now that it has garnered a huge audience, numerous passionate fans and five Oscar nominations, it is time to put on my toe shoes, wrap my ribbons, paint on my four-inch black eyebrows, lace-up my wet-tutu suit and take a grand jeté into Aronofsky’s swamp. I mean lake.

I first saw this film at a screening last November, before it opened to the public. I had high hopes: Aronofsky had done a great deal of homework on the “ballet world,” consulting with many dancers, myself included. Reading the script a year or so previously, I’d been baffled by its reductive simplicity. But, hey, I thought, what do I know about script writing—and Aronofsky and his people seemed like earnest folk.

The film opens with a gorgeous low-lit scene of a ballerina’s beautiful legs and feet ensconced in the shimmering satin sheaths that are the art’s greatest symbol, dancing to the great soaring strains of Tchaikovsky’s passionate score. Oh goody, I thought, I will be swept away by this: the magic, the music, the beauty, the lines, those hypnotizing arched feet that skim the stage on their toes like purring paws (the ballerina was, of course, not the film’s star, Natalie Portman, but her double, Sarah Lane, a real dancer from American Ballet Theatre.)

Unfortunately it proved a terrible tease—the only lyrical moment in a film ostensibly about a lyrical art prior to the onslaught of histrionics that ensue.

One hundred and eight minutes later, as the movie ended, the friend I took—not a dancer—turned to me and asked in all seriousness, “Was that supposed to be camp?” There, on the screen, was a beautiful, bleeding-into-her-tutu Portman as the White Swan, uttering those portentous dying words: “Perfect . . . It was perfect.” As a dancer, I have never been so perfectly insulted.

I had thought when I read those words in the script, this is really stupid simple (the opposite of wicked smart, I would venture), but maybe Aronofsky has one of those things you hear film directors sometimes have: a vision. This was the vision? A dead ballerina in a bloody tutu with the caption “It was perfect”? He could not possibly be basing a film on a ballet dancer—the most fleet, complex, and powerful artist of the physical that exists—and the great 19th-century love story that is Tchaikovsky’s Swan Lake by reducing it to one crazy girl’s addiction to perfection. Or could he? Is this how he sees our art? Like a profession full of self-destructive addicts that need an A&E Intervention, a Dr. Phil “How’s it working for you?” talk, or an Oprah bailout? Aronofsky totally missed—or dismissed—the love story that is the raison d’être of the entire ballet and, instead, myopically latched on like a pit bull (and with the same finesse) to the White Swan/Madonna-Black Swan/whore dichotomy and then delivers his sophomoric dissertation with a sledgehammer. He does, however, clearly delineate his Cygnini discoveries: a White Swan masturbates in white grannie panties, while a Black Swan goes (black) thongless into the night. (Aronofsky clearly has a penchant for mutants: his next film is The Wolverine.)

Black Swan provides the most recent—though most egregious—example of the “ballerinas-are-victims” stance that certain good Samaritans love to embrace (“those dancers are too thin, they are just too too thin”) on occasion to aggrandize themselves, while patronizing those superb creatures whose absolute commitment to excellence they cannot understand. Ballet is the practice of physicalized morality, a poetic standard for every man and woman's ideal capacity," wrote Lincoln Kirstein, who founded the New York City Ballet with Balanchine. To imply that its proponents, dancers, are victims rather than teachers provides swift avoidance of that uncomfortable suggestion. Aronofsky has created a movie celebrating the failure of a ballerina, and by implication her entire art—disguised, insidiously, as a film about sacrifice and success.

As Black Swan so clearly demonstrates, one simply cannot “act” being a ballerina. It is a state of being, of feeling, of mind, an externalized expression of internalized discipline, faith, and good manners.

But I am too harsh. Perhaps Black Swan is simply Aronofsky’s bloody, melodramatic, nonsensical, middle-of-the-road, badly-written bid for box-office success after he tasted its heady brine with the success of the excellent The Wrestler. It could have been such rip-roaring good fun (see Jim Carrey's rendition from Saturday Night Live). And a real nice break from the dull, repetitive, hard work of a true ballerina. But then Black Swan isn’t a film about real ballerinas at all, no more than Jurassic Park is a film about real scientists (or real dinosaurs for that matter)—it merely exploits the locale, the props, and the outerwear. Balletploitation is born.

This brings us to Aronofsky’s heroine: his waify, whiny, bulimic little ballerina, Nina Sayers. Don’t you just love her? The little swan who simply couldn’t fly. And then we hear—over and over —that poor hard-working Natalie Portman had to actually lose weight and work really, really, hard—I mean really hard—for a number of months to pass, barely, as a professional dancer in the film, and only then between her neck and waist (don’t look further down: it isn’t there. Even her double—the one who actually did work really hard for several decades—is hardly on screen). A ballerina without her legs and feet is like a writer without words or a singer without a voice: not one. No wonder Portman looks so beleaguered in the film: she is perhaps the first amputee professional ballerina. But, hey, it’s Hollywood, and she has already won a Golden Globe and will likely garner an Oscar for her dorsal efforts. (Her upper-body-only performance does, however, enable her to wear the first strapless tutus in dance history.)

“The world of ballet,” Portman told French Vogue after making the film “is sick, sick, sick.” Portman, however, has bravely overcome her distaste and is marrying, and reproducing, into the profession all the same. Portman is a lovely actress of considerable accomplishment in other films, but here her one-note earnest angst, denoted by furrowed brow from start to finish, is entirely unlike any real ballerina—a woman who “must have the nobility of a five-star general,” as Agnes de Mille once said—rather than Portman’s insecure little misery. As Black Swan so clearly demonstrates, one simply cannot “act” being a ballerina. It is a state of being, of feeling, of mind, an externalized expression of internalized discipline, faith, and good manners. And of course, one needs those inconvenient legs and feet.

While the result is one almost hilariously sensationalistic movie (Aronofsky even misses being either high or low camp), I have a sneaking suspicion that the director wanted his film, at least in part, to be about the Birth of an Artist. He wants to bludgeon his tutu and wear it too. In straddling his themes—a serious film about the making of an artist, and Psycho at the ballet—he misses both, and flaps around in no swan’s lake.

This, of course, the public is lapping up, especially, I surmise, the vast audience caught in the fangs of vampire love (the Twilight books and movies, True Blood, The Vampire Diaries.) Black Swan has all the same seductive red, white and black elements of blood, innocence, and death delivered with risible solemnity and repressed sexuality. Nosferatu gets a tutu! Besides, there is nothing quite like white feathers and tulle to slowly absorb and spread the blood of a nice deep, suicide stigmata. And what did Nina stab herself with? Oh yes, a shard of her smashed dressing room mirror. I get it, I get it, the mirror murder, death of narcissism by narcissism (the buzzword for those obsessive ballerinas.)

I don’t care in the least that Aronofsky’s depiction of the ballet world and its anxious protagonists uses every blatant cliché about this rarified world, where anorexia, bulimia, self-mutilation, suppressed sexuality (but lots of attempted masturbation!), jealousy, stage mothers from hell, and vulgar, violent, lascivious company directors predominate. And don’t forget the requisite bloody toe close-up. Ewww! (For the record: A bloody toe for a ballerina is like a bruise for a boxer: ho-hum.)

Aronofsky displays neither respect, nor wonder, nor fascination, nor, alas, love for ballet in his film—he sees only half-clad wacko women: all four women in his mutilating misogynistic fetish are uber-crazy chicks. Predictably, he also repeats the truly absurd notion that a young female dancer needs drugs, alcohol, a wild tattooed girlfriend, and pick-up sex to the din of deafening disco music to “loosen up,” to be sexy and alluring on stage. This is a shameless manipulation (hello Hollywood!) to give regular teenage girls a point of connection to those rarified creatures. But the fact remains that reckless, self-destructive girls are simply not the ones who succeed in ballet—they are dropouts who must go to college. Aronofsky did, however, almost win me over with the prospect of skinny crazed lesbian ballerinas in sex scenes with themselves and each other (how else to get men to a movie about ballet?) But even here, the scenes are both passionless and humorless.

Despite all this—or, more likely, because of it—Nina Sayers is the first crazy ballerina to have reached across the elitist wall of the ballet convent into the general public’s awareness, since 1986 when our own bona fide great ballerina Gelsey Kirkland wrote her bestselling memoir Dancing On My Grave (could have been Aronofsky’s title). Kirkland’s real-life drama did include starvation, vomiting, drug addiction, rivals, failed plastic surgery, multiple obsessions, and bad sex with Baryshnikov. (Kirkland was diagnosed by the world-renowned analyst Dr. Otto Kernberg as having borderline personality disorder while under his inpatient care.) Suffice it to say that no real ballerina, Kirkland included, would survive, much less succeed, with such an illness. It is important to note that Kirkland was a very great ballerina before she unraveled—not, sadly, after.

What is even sadder is that the only glimpses of the ballet world that most of the general public sees—and then believes—are these extreme aberrations. I have heard it said of Black Swan’s popularity: “But at least ballet is going on people’s radar.” Better ballet stay off their radar, if so inaccurately represented as a world of insane perfectionists, rather than what it is: a world of masterful devotees to beauty.”

Toni Bentley danced with the New York City Ballet for 10 years and is the author of five books including “Winter Season, A Dancer’s Journal” and “The Surrender, An Erotic Memoir.” She is a Guggenheim Fellow, and her story “The Bad Lion” was recently published in “Best American Essays 2010."

J on: S/M, legs, ballet & fasteners

Rubber-chick with her service zip teasingly open

About the photo: I do the same thing when trolling Naughty’s for a hookup when I need the novelty of a new man. If I’m feeling very assertive I will take another woman’s man. I’ve made some enemies doing that, but it’s so much fun to have that power over a man and use it! If I find a man I want I open my service zip about half way and appear at his table and start a conversation. Then I’ll put a pointe in his lap and turn out my hips which spread the opening giving him a whiff of my estrogenic sweat and vaginal discharge mixed with the strong scent of body warmed latex. I’m not subtle and the woman he’s with senses what’s going on the minute I appear at their table. I try to limit myself to men I’ve see pick up women in the Meat Market bar so I’m not hitting on a married couple from Peoria.

Our fetishes & sexuality dialog continues as ‘J’ shares more of his thoughts and experiences:

Self centeredness and sex: J “Most people don't understand or accept the notion that sex is a self centered activity. By its very nature it involves mechanical stimulation… such as penis in vagina... or lips kissing or sucking or hand fondling and caressing. All these mechanical inputs come from a partner… and some of them can be provided by ourselves - masturbation or auto eroticism and some can be provided by mechanical devices... fucking machines or bondage gear. So even though sex is about OUR pleasure is pretty much involves a willing, skilled partner to provide us with the stims we need for what ever reason we are so wired to find those stimuli erotic. There ARE variations, but most people share similar mechanical trigger because that is how our sensory nervous system works. We all recognize that partners are part of "normal" sexual interactions. And this means that we typically play a dual role in a sexual encounter. We received stimuli from our partner. And we provide stimuli to our partner. However there are some caveats here and they are as follows. 1) In pay for sex; the person who pays gets to typically define what goes on... ie the encounter is designed to get them off in the manner that they want and 2) The provider of that pleasure sexual interests do not matter. It is a one way transaction. She or he being paid for their services MAY find what they are doing erotic and pleasurable and that would be fine, but it is not required. They may be required to ACT as if they are "getting off" as part of the illusion for the paying "client". And most I suppose do. It goes with the territory. Fetish sex often separates the notion of mutuality into one which is focused on the erotic needs of one of the partners. The other, by consent has the role of "effectuator" of the pleasure of the other partner. This is often defined as D/S and even some maintain that the sub's pleasure is simply in pleasing the Dom. I suspect this is rubbish, but it sounds good. Can our own orgasm be related solely to the orgasm of another person? So in fetish sex... it's often about one person receiving the stim and the other supplying it. S&M is often framed as mutual pleasure... the masochist enjoys the pain... the sadists gets off on the whipping.”

I can certainly relate to this. Ballet dancers are often self-centered and I’m that way in spades. I want to be perfect (but not quite to the extent that I become delusional like Nina Sayers, at least not yet) in my technique and presentation and that desire to be perfect has carried over into obtaining sexual pleasure as I have become expert in knowing my body and pushing my limits.

Sadism & Masochism: J “D/s and S&M activities make more sense on a conceptual level than they do on a neuro-physiological level. It's pretty hard to see how whipping would cause the whipper to get off? I suppose it's possible and they could whip a tree and have an orgasm in that case. But if a sadist IS or can "get off" from their sadistic activities, it clearly is from a psychological conception in their mind. The idea of power, or expression of their power, and or seeing someone suffering at their hand and that person being unable to do anything about it is what gets sadists off. The odd thing about sexual sadists is that they claim that the person must consent to their abuse… ie like it. Absent consent it's not sexual sadism, but pathological sadism. The masochist, by giving consent is sanctioning a sadist to unleash their sadism. Good thing there are masochists out there to provide this thin veil of cover for what is a psychopathic in no uncertain terms. Justification for cruelty is virtually impossible even when the victim of the cruelty demands it. This sort of "contract" for sexual or fetish contact underscores the "selfish" nature of kinky encounters. They truly have turned sex into something more akin to a sport. Sports have rules, are usually competition between two players (or more), have special gear and involve the body often in direct physical contact. People advance in the skill by training, experience and practice and for the most part sports involve some sort of transaction or give and take between the opponents... who are each playing to "win" the match. So many of the things we do are woven together by our unconscious mind. And this explains, to me at least, why so few people understand what they do, even when they show skill in doing it. Which brings me to training and things such as ballet and diving... and its possible connection to fetish.”

I agree that the power of the sadist is in the sensory thrill of causing someone to suffer at his or her hand, but in most cases my S/M partners and I have safe words so the encounter can be stopped if it passes some defined limit. I love rough pointe sex, where I’m penetrated from behind by a man of the correct height and with the correct penis size so while I’m balanced en pointe and bent over holding onto the barre when he thrusts into me he can not only ram my cervix – even when I’m fully aroused – but lifts my feet off the floor when I’m most deeply penetrated! That way I get the pain of my toes being compressed in the blocks of my pointes when I’m dropped on the floor and having my cervix rammed. If it’s a really great encounter my partner will not only give me a G-spot orgasm but I’ll be able to work through the pain of having my cervix rammed to reach a rarer cervical orgasm. And at least with my sadistic partners, my screams, tears and occasionally blood do seem to be enough for them to be sexually exhausted after rough pointe sex. Possibly because they are sore from ramming me and partly from the strength of my contractions with which I gripped them during orgasm, which some partners have told me they find painful.

M/F form, rules, ballet and fetishes: J “Obviously a key aspect of dance is the human form itself. And further it is the human form in motion and often partnering between the two sexes. This is clearly very much aligned with sexual activity - male w/ female partnering etc. Dance however, takes physical play a notch or two higher because it injects a few things: 1) Rules - These are the steps and positions and even partnering moves such as lifts. Sex contact is ad hoc and we do what pleases us and our partners. We don't follow "outside" rules. Again fetish play mimics the rule based nature of the engagement, though these rules are somewhat less formal and more individual, but they are always present in a fetish "engagement". Some D/s is extremely rules driven. Classical ballet is rule based to the extreme. 2) Body Conscious - Both fetish and dance are extremely body conscious. Ballet is perhaps the most demanding in the form of the body and this restricts it to those with the bodies which conform to the idealized form... such as the Balanchine ballerina. In fact the corps is almost intended to appear as completely identical bodies...almost depersonalized copies of each other moving in machine like synchronicity. On the other hand the soloists etc are using their movement to display the body in the most stunning poses, positions and motions with understanding of épaulement, and line and so forth… a sort of perfection of presentation of the human form.”

“Body conscious plus rules! Interaction at a distance - like fetish sex dancing is a kind of intimacy at a distance involving two people who work together and even require each other but do not actually "merge" as in penetrative sex of any kind. At best it alludes to such intimacy but obviously cannot "go there" without being pornographic. It's meant to be art. Roles and Costumes - Both fetish and ballet share the need to put the participants in costumes and play roles Diving has apparently become a fetish for some people, perhaps more a fantasy for most who claim the fetish. It shares with dance, sport and sex in general esoteric knowledge about the body and in particular how breathing and pressure affect and influence our mental and physical being. Sex, dance and ballet all involve breathing which is required for us to "perform" properly. If we can’t breathe properly the activity we are engaged in suffers or in the case of diving can be fatal. Changes in oxygen or introduction of gas (or other chemicals) into our blood stream and past the blood brain barrier into our brains DOES change our mental state. The sexual response does involve engorgement of blood into our erogenous zones and this kicks off the sexual response. Dive sex definitely plays with the role of breathing associated with sexual arousal states. And again, diving and dance involve special gear and costumes which are integral to any fetish. Dive gear definitely plays on the theme of protection because that is precisely its function.”

Dive-sex as a body shaper: A shape enhancement feature of dive-sex that usually goes unmentioned is that especial for women with less than prefect bodies the body is nearly weightless when supported by water so our soft tissue, breasts and buttocks and even poorly toned arms and legs, are presented to their best advantage, w/o sagging. And, while I’m on the subject of dive-sex I want to mention that it’s pool-pointes - which are molded silicone pointe shoes that are buoyancy neutral, but which can have weights screwed onto the platforms to provide vertical attitude stability on the bottom of the pool – that are often used during dive-sex for couples who are into ballet fetishes.

Ballet-boots: J “I need to cycle back to the now ubiquitous ballet boots and shoes in so many fetish closets and even mentioned in "dive sex" which combines the ballet, basic fetish and the diving fetish. Pointe is quite unique to ballet, hardly seen in modern dance. It is very much part of the rule based system of classical ballet dance vocabulary. Point extends the line of the leg, changes the posture unless one's muscles and tendons etc. have been really evolved from their normal structure. These body posture changes occur with all tall heels and it affects the attitude of the pelvis. This change in attitude of the pelvis is perceived and felt as a focus on the pelvis region which is the focus of sexual activity - coitus. Mastering pointe work is not only about a long beautiful line, but in the fetish mind about a more controlled and hence powerful pelvic region. Ballerinas, with their flexibility and strength are correctly perceived as masters of their bodies perfected in form and in control of them including their pelvic muscles. While a typical female with a "good shape" can delight the eye, a ballerina or dancer is perhaps understood to do that and have the body motion skill to take this delight into the physical, their physical interactions as in sex. Jill explains how ballet boots and pointe work can and does make a dancer or wearer of same not submissive and trapped horizontally on a bed or in some pose, but frees her to express a movement skill which is completely the reverse of submission it is expressive of mastering and control of her own body! It is a unique skill which gives those who posses it an elite position. And as such is understandably a coveted aspect in a female partner.”

Well said: I think the above analysis of the ballet-boot and its pleasures is spot on! I do wear custom made Ballet-Boots for the effect they have on some men, and often when I’m on duty at the casino for their shock value among the tourists and the uninitiated, but I’ve always thought of ballet-boots as a poor relation to the pointe shoe. Someone called BBs “a pointe shoe with a training-heel” I suppose for those people with weak feet and ankles a quality pair of pointe boots are safer and easier to stand and perhaps walk around a bit in to get the thrill of being en pointe and some of the pain of wearing pointes. So in that regard they are better for the pointe fetishist with no ballet training. And there is the bondage aspect for someone being locked into a pair for hours or days at a time, which can be excruciating.

Gepetto did have a small run of prototype pairs of rubber underwater bondage boots (UBBs) made, but serious accidents among knowledgeable testers during field trials of the UBB convinced him that they were too dangerous (for him to sell) even to experienced divers - someone called them ‘suicide boots’ - so they never got out of prototype. A Dom fetishist who is determined to have a Sub war something similar can use an inexpensive leather pair which will be ruined by immersing them in water, but can be just as effective as a killer. Other than the bondage aspect wearers are nearly weightless in water so regular pool-pointes work fine.

The female leg, its form and texture: J “Legs (female) as the root of fetish the female leg is linked to a vast number of fetishes which are often combined, mixed and blended and not well understood by people who are susceptible to them. The analogy might be to how we use language with its grammar rules... many can speak and write well… ie use language without any formal understanding of grammar which makes communication possible. The leg is the driving force behind the following fetishes: hose, stockings, hold ups and suspender belts, boots, shoes, ballet boots, hairlessness and perhaps a few others. At the bottom of this collection of fetishes is the notion that at the top of the female’s legs one finds her pelvis and vagina. In a sense the legs are like a pedestal upon which the prize of the vagina is found and "displayed". Like so many things which frame the main attraction, there is an obvious need to make the frame, or the pedestal, as appealing and attractive as possible. Certainly the reverse would be off putting and "disrespect" the prize. So the leg fetish begins with the smoothness and perfection of a shaved or hairless leg. Hair not only distracts and destroys the perfection of the form, but it doesn't feel as nice and sex for most is about "feeling nice". Very few people will find hairy legs and stubble appealing. Next is the form itself. Our form is defined by the bones, flesh and to a large part muscle structure. Firm toned flesh controls the form and so some visible muscle tone makes the leg more attractive, and the absence of muscle tone makes it less attractive. A general rule of visual aesthetics is that long and thin is more attractive than short and squat (another discussion). We see this in not only our preference for long legged women (and men), but long thin fingers, necks, arms and even long hair. Short is less attractive than long. We see this in the preferred bodies of ballerinas, in the basic steps and movements which attempt to show off long and thin such as 180 degree extensions... and the foot on pointe extending the leg 6 -8". A leg needs to have curves and form in its shape.”

Leg adornment: J “Shape is beauty in natural form and is seen as a pleasant and proportional collection of curves. This is similar to the rules of proportion in classical architecture though less rigorous. So with the underlying pedestal as focus and arrow to display the V - the ultimate prize we then go on to adorn the pedestal... we encase it in hose, we hold up the hose with straps and garters, we create hose which shapes and "perfects" the leg, or adds a color or pattern to the form to adorn it. We cover it completely in barriers of leather, or rubber to reveal its form but hide the actual flesh in a kind of tease which takes away one aspect of the naked leg causing obsession on that very aspect… soft smooth naked skin. And then there are the heels which reshape the leg... extend the line to use a ballet term... to tense the muscles, tilt the pelvis where the prize sits. The tall heel itself then becomes a fetish in itself. It is meant to raise the heel and making this as thin as possible brings attention to this height raising role of the heel by reducing it to a slender delicate column where almost all the forces of the leg are concentrated. The toe box of the shoe or boot likewise is fetishized. Usually it is to unnaturally extend the foot into (the appearance of) a fine point (as opposed to a blunt end). Shoe and boot forms themselves are works of art in shaping the containment of the foot into a stunning work of curves and structure. Being the foundation for the pedestal, the shoe, or boot bottom becomes an obsessive part of the leg. And this doesn't even consider that our feet with their toes are anthropologically similar to our hands and many people have extempore "sensitive" feet. Shoes and boots protect and contain these sensitive appendages. The tall boot shaft is particularly associated with fetishes... and seen in the idea of evolving a ballet pointe into a high heeled shoe (at the extreme limit of heel height) and then into a shoe and a boot and into an entire leg encasing boot. The most fetishistic boots are the tallest right up to the crotch where the prize sits.”

The fasteners role in fetishes: J “Encasement fetishes involve two aspects of encasement. The encasement material itself – leather and rubber, stretching, body clinging and molding materials and how they are made to fit and enclose. Rubber with its stretchiness requires no straps, zipper or hardware to hold it in place. These may be present to make getting into tight rubber possible. In fact getting any material to hug the body will require stretchiness or closures like zips and laces or straps. All of these closures then become part of the fetish. All these bindings drive what evolves from the underlying fixation on the leg into the over arching fetish of bondage. Bondage of course having two broad branches - the compression of encasement without restriction of motion and the restrictive bondage where the body can struggle but cannot move. All the hardware and bindings of fetish "gear" are themselves integral to and in many cases actual fetishes themselves. The act of strapping, lacing, latching and even locking a garment become analogous to the motions we do in a sexual encounter flesh to flesh. Both parties can find lacing or doing up straps, or zips erotic activities themselves, much the way getting dressed in fetish attire is itself considered an erotic and highly charged activity. This is understood as ..."I am getting into my sex gear." And this is very different than getting dressed to head out to a normal day where our clothing plays a very different role (though being a sex message is included in those roles especially for females).”

For the fetishist our bondage boutique, Fasteners, has an extensive selection of rope, and chain in varying materials and weight ranges as well as locks, handcuffs, leather, rubber and nylon straps as well as masks, rebreather bags, hoods, gags and sex toys of all descriptions. And they have a limited supply of mid-range enclosure suits and the shop assistants will take measurements for made-to-order high end rubber and leather fetishwear.

Compare & contrast: J “Leg derived fetishes like others exploit the idea of contrast. Contrast is the most fundamental means by which our sensory system works. Whatever sense we are referring to, it works by noting contrast or change from some "steady state". This could be the edge between two forms or colors... the difference in tone or intensity of sound or tactile pressure or taste and smell and so forth. We learn about and process the world by using "contrasts". Fetishes love contrasts. Dressing a feminine women in what appears to be hard "danger" clothing draws attention to her femininity in a sense. Over emphasis on laces, straps, locks and hardware closure draws attention to the vulnerability of that which is strapped, laced or locked. Even the ideal female fetish form is an exaggeration of the female form. She has a tiny waist, enormous stand up breasts, huge pouty puffy lips, enormous eyes and lashes and long pony tails evocative of horses and all the lore associated with tack and training, dressage, grooming and presentation. Therefore it is likely that a great many fetishes are related to legs. Legs are what make most dance dance... Legs are used to hold a male in some coital positions... Legs are the pedestals which carry and lead up to the pelvis and the prized vagina. And legs even terminate in the ass which is also a body part of enormous sexual attraction for multiple reasons. Even non fetishists have a "weakness" for female legs which are clearly understood as sexy and provocative. Short skirts play on this in a kind of homage to the leg and a tease that the vagina is barely protected from view. The combination of thigh boot and mini skirt is a kind of fetish double whammy... a tease and complete cover up. For some ballet boots or extreme heels are a bondage device and understood as making the wearer submissive. This is not always the case. As for silicone and underwater ballet boots and so forth... this is clearly an understandable fantasy, but I have seen no examples of them and have only read of same in Jill's World. I suppose if they don't exist yet, they will soon. I suppose the same applies to bladed heels and so forth... fantasy which someone might bother to create. Fetishes are applied mental constructs and it takes people who understand a fetish to express it in some fetish gear. Some do it with finesse and elegance and even nuance. Most however, are less conscious followers and adapt fetish as an elitist type of sex. Who wants to be like the masses? "

Quest for the Grail: I thought with the buildup of fetishes from a woman’s feet and shoes to her legs their shape and covering ending at the pelvis containing the vagina my intrepid fetish scribe touched, however tangentially, on the seat of a woman’s power, I am hoping he will share with us his thoughts on the fetishes surrounding the ultimate prize itself.

NWU has live sex demo

A Sybian machine

Chicago Sun-Times
BY KARA SPAK
Staff reporter

Northwestern University defends after-class live sex demonstration

More than 100 Northwestern University students watched as a naked 25-year-old woman was penetrated by a sex toy wielded by her fiancée during an after-class session of the school’s popular “Human Sexuality” class.

The woman said she showed up at the Feb. 21 lecture in the Ryan Family Auditorium in Evanston expecting just to answer questions, but was game to demonstrate. The course’s professor on Wednesday acknowledged some initial hesitation, but said student feedback was “uniformly positive.”

And Northwestern defended the class and its professor.

“Northwestern University faculty members engage in teaching and research on a wide variety of topics, some of them controversial and at the leading edge of their respective disciplines,” said Alan K. Cubbage, vice president for University Relations. “The University supports the efforts of its faculty to further the advancement of knowledge.”

The optional, non-credit demo followed psychology Prof. John Michael Bailey’s sexuality class. Nearly 600 students are in Bailey’s class this quarter, and most didn’t stick around for the after-class show, which featured four members of Chicago’s fetish community describing “BDSM,” or bondage, discipline, sadism and masochism.

“I didn’t expect to see a live sex show,” said Justin Smith, 21, a senior economics and political science major who was in the after-class session. “We were told we were going to have some people talk to us about the fetish world and kink.”

Smith said it took him awhile to process what happened, but he doesn’t object to the way the material was presented.

“It was for me academic like everything else,” he said.

He told his grandparents about the class.

“My grandma was like, wow, Northwestern is a little bit different then when I went there,” he said.

In a statement, Bailey said he hesitated briefly before allowing the public sex act.

“My hesitation concerned the likelihood that many people would find this inappropriate,” he wrote. “My decision to say ‘yes’ reflected my inability to come up with a legitimate reason why students should not be able to watch such a demonstration.”

After the demonstration, several students tried a different sex toy that gave a “titillating” but not painful shock, testing it out on their arms, said Ken Melvoin-Berg, who narrated the after-class lecture. Melvoin-Berg said the school paid him between $300 to $500 for his appearance.

Faith Kroll, the woman who stripped, was laying down on a towel when she was penetrated. When she arrived, she thought she just would be answering students’ questions and showing off sex toys they brought, including whips, paddles and a clown wig.

An “absurd, clinical” video and subsequent discussion about various aspects of female orgasm led Faith and her partner Jim Marcus, 45, to prove to the class that female orgasm is real.

Faith said she was not coerced in any way and students were repeatedly warned it was going to get graphic.

“One of the students asked what my specific fetish was and mine is being in front of people, having the attention and being used,” she said. “The students seemed really intrigued.”

In his statement, Bailey said student feedback was “uniformly positive.”

Marcus, a musician who said he has worked as a sex educator, said he thinks it is “smart and important” for students to be learn about sexuality.

“It’s really scary for young people who want to get involved in the BDSM community who don’t understand issues regarding consent and safety,” he said.

Melvoin-Berg said he met Prof. Bailey through a swinging couple who previously spoke to the class. Melvoin-Berg runs the “Weird Chicago Red Light District Sex Tour,” which has participants playing games like “spot the ho” as they travel the city looking for prostitutes. He also teaches “Networking for Kinky People,” a 3-hour version of the one hour lecture he gave at Northwestern.

Melvoin-Berg said the sex toy used was BDSM, but was “not like a pain thing...we wanted to make it poignant.”

“I did mention this was going to be the best money their parents had spent on their education,” he said.

Bill Yarber, a researcher at Indiana University’s Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender, and Reproduction and author of the textbook Human Sexuality: Diversity in Contemporary America, said he’s never heard of a naked woman being brought to orgasm in front of a class of students.

“The way you present it there is very unconventional,” he said. “There’s certain boundaries of things, I think, that are acceptable and that would certainly be pushing that.”

This isn’t Bailey’s first brush with controversy. His 2003 book, “The Man Who Would Be Queen,” sparked hostile debate in the transgender community by claiming that there were more reasons for men to become women then simply that biology trapped them in the wrong body. Several transgender women who spoke with Bailey claimed they did not consent to being used for research and accused him of practicing psychology without a license.

Bailey said in his statement Wednesday that during the Feb. 21 after-class lecture, “I was not in a mood to surrender to sex negativity and fear.”

“Do I have any regrets?” he wrote on Wednesday. “It is mostly too early to say. I certainly have no regrets concerning Northwestern students, who have demonstrated that they are open-minded grown ups rather than fragile children.”

Personal comment: I hope Professor Bailey is tenured. Sadly the couple did not use a Sybian machine which provides a quality experience! But it would have been more difficult to carry than the hand-held device they used. At St Lucy’s the Administration understands the needs of today’s students to have as much real-world experience in human sexuality as possible while still supervised in school. Fortunately St Lucy’s is not beholden to outside sources for funds in any way. The widow of a billionaire, at her death a few years ago, left an immense endowment for the school that has left it financially independent. That independence has allowed us to ignore some of societies more conservative constraints and allowed an interpretation of sexuality in general and female sexuality in particular to emphasize the importance of giving as well as receiving all forms of sexual pleasure and to immerse young women in the subject in the most intimate ways.

An analysis of ‘protection’ fetishes

Latex encased Sub with hood, gasmask & posture collar

Our fetishes & sexuality dialog continues as ‘J’ shares more of his thoughts and experiences on the subject:

J “You mentioned getting yeast infections from wearing latex undies. This is because yeast grows in moist dark environments and latex prevents the transport of moisture. But so does wearing a catsuit all day or all night! ...or a Penetrator plug for that matter! Perhaps you could comment on this?”

You’re absolutely right, unless precautions are taken. Before the clinical trial of an effective biocide that prevented the overgrowth of some normal vaginal flora YIs were fairly common and time consuming to treat for women who wore impermeable enclosure suits or lingerie for extended intervals. The risk could be minimized by leaving the service (crotch) zipper of encasement suits open when the wearer was not on display, but that is at best a stopgap and inelegant solution. In the last year, now that Semécide+, the professional O9 spermicide, lube and biocide, is in stage 3 trials a 5 ml applicator of the clear gel in the vagina before inserting a Penetrator or squeezing into a latex catsuit for an extended interval reduces the likelihood of developing a YI by about 85% even for women who are highly susceptible to them. Jeff is hoping his labs will get FDA approval to market it commercially if it turns out to be the success that initial data indicates. Of course if a woman has a latex allergy she loses the latex advantage, but there are still silicone, PCV and leather as well as fabric zentai, but being unable to wear latex puts a fetish chick at a considerable disadvantage as far as choices are concerned.

J “I think you miss the point about the difference between acquiring a skill set and developing a fetish for something which may require a skill. Unless the person finds some pleasure or attraction to the activity, being skilled does not mean it has become or will become a sexual fetish.”

I thought I was clear that I work with my AST students to identify the ones who not only acquire the skills being taught, but more importantly get pleasure from them and I guide them along the path to unanticipated delights. It is those young women who will be the among the elite fetishists of their generation in the years to come. In the case of almost all of the female escort candidates I work with, learning the skills is all they are interested in and most are adept at feigning pleasure or what ever emotion the client wants during a commercial encounter.

J “Of course, the idea that a sexual libertine who is kinky can exploit this and "sell" an array of sexual services to those who can't get these for free... or who like the novelty different partners. These persons are not into intimacy and have overcome their shyness about their kinks and how bizarre they may be, especially when a non judgmental person will fulfill his fantasies. Most have gone past shyness to the notion that their sexuality is superior and liberated and expansive... and are very comfortable with their kinks. But it's always about their own selfish erotic pleasure. Obviously when that pleasure involves a partner, the fetishist wants the partner to be equally aroused and pleasured by the encounter. That makes it not selfish, but mutual. And most people don't like the idea of being selfish, even when they are”

I recognize myself in that description. Though I’m very self-centered I do (almost always) want my partner to enjoy the encounter we are having. The exception is when I’m hunting a predator who has injured a friend. Then I my sadistic streak shows itself and I derive a great deal pleasure exacting retribution for the injury s/he has caused someone in my circle.

A man’s perspective on ‘protection’: I’m quoting this in its entirety because J deals at length with various aspects of ‘protection’ in the fetish world and I agree with almost all of it.

Leather: J “Protection in fetish attire is a common mental construct. It was more commonly associated with leather which was clearing more rugged than textiles. The earlier forms of kink were "rough sex" such as S&M. So the S&M people adopted leather clothing because it represented what one would wear to protect themselves in dangerous situations. It also of course was the skin of a dead animal... and implied conquest in taken the skin of an animal that have given its life to protect the wearer. Leather, unlike textiles had a smell and was distinguished from textiles as it was a continuous surface, not woven from threads. This gave it the ability to keep out liquids and so forth which can penetrate woven textiles. This is another attribute of leather which imbues the wearer with the feeling that they are protected and there for less vulnerable to "attack" and more powerful for it. Virtually everyone feels vulnerable naked (even if they are exhibitionistic). So the reverse of naked is less vulnerable and the less naked, the more covered the person feels even less vulnerable to the point of being armored and safe. It's both a mental and actual phenomena. Armor does offer some protection! There are many reasons why leather has so much power in the BDSM world. All the straps (and even whips) and so forth from equestrian tack to the simple belts and straps we use for every day clothing are evocative of restraint, closure, and entrapment of something. So it is easy to understand why leather has been fetishized as it addresses the vulnerability of nakedness absence of protection.

Latex: J “Latex came on much later. It has a similar basis for appeal, but being different it provides a different set of reasons it is fetishized. It still comes under the heading of "protection" because it represents a barrier between ones naked flesh and the eyes of others, one's partner and the environment. It is truly impermeable and the chemical barrier nature of latex is well understood by everyone especially fetishists. Rubber is used for this purpose for rain gear, medical gear and contraceptives. All uses for protection. Of course like leather it offers no protection against sharp puncture. Leather protects against abrasion, latex somewhat the same, but because latex is so thin the abrasion will quickly destroy it. But latex has some special qualities which take protection a step further than leather. It can be made and is made very thin and it stretches. This means that a latex garment can and does fit precisely to the skin and shape of the wearer. In fact it can and is made smaller so that it even compresses the skin over the entire body. The amount of pressure is related to the fit and the thickness. But even the thinnest latex will always make the wearer aware that there is a constant overall compression of the skin over the entire body.”

Encasement & the Skin: J “And of course who doesn't know that it is through the nerves in our skin that we experience the world "mechanically". And it is from the nerves in our skin and in particular our erogenous zones which induce erotic pleasure. Sexual encounters are understood to be between two people who fondle, caress and manipulate their partners flesh usually erotic zones to arouse desire and induce orgasm. But not everyone finds enclosure attractive or sensual. Some find it confining and too hot as evaporative cooling of sweat is not possible. Some find the accumulation of sweat inside the suit uncomfortable or cuts into the erotic feel. Most people discover (even avowed enclosurists) that these suits become uncomfortable to wear in a short time and are very vulnerable to local environment. People are too hot or too cold as latex does not mediate or assist the body as textiles do. Latex enclosurists accept the limitations for the short term benefits and understand that sexual experience are typically not marathons, but sprints, though many seek to extend the experience as long as possible.”

Latex & Arousal: J “Most fetishists seem to have discovered the pleasures of the arousal phase, and seek to extend it and the orgasm though important is not what fetish is about - it's about getting there and there are lots of interesting ways to do it once one opens themselves up to those possibilities. Fetishists have discovered that they can actually receive a kind of caress and fondling from their clothing. Many find that their entire skin is made sensitive and responsive because of the gentle pressure of the latex compression on their skin. And then there's the actual texture of latex which is as smoother or for some smoother than skin (think hair covered skin). Latex turns our entire skin into one of a continuous smooth second skin. It doesn't even inhibit our sense of touch. In some cases it actually amplifies touch by transmitting pressure across its surface to other areas of our skin. Not only is it smooth but it is so smooth to be shiny and even reflective... a more perfect skin than our own. People like to lose themselves inside their latex skin. They conceptualize that their body fluids are kept inside, those of the world are kept outside and they are safely enclosed, yet under constant titillation by the compression. And there are some more attributes to fetishize.”

Latex scents & anonymity: J “Latex and leather and plastic clothes, unlike textiles have a distinct smell. Perhaps the idea that we have our own smells, makes the idea of encapsulating them and offering another one to others is appealing, or it is just the idea that smell is an strong erotic cue. But the aroma of latex is one of attributes which many find erotic. All rubber has some odor. Some rubber and latexes have a particularly sweet aroma, like vanilla perhaps. This aroma performs like a perfume to arouse desire in the wearer or their partner. And perhaps the last attribute is anonymity, the identity concealment aspect to dressing for pleasure. In most sex we strip down to reveal who we are at our most basic.... nothing to hide, it all hangs out. This is us at our most vulnerable (least protected) as noted above, but it also who we are. But dressing lets us be something different, somewhat at least. And the clothing we put on is a kind of message to ourselves but more so to others who we interact it with. Lots of these messages are well understood in society. Mini skirts mean one thing. Long loose ones another, Jeans means one thing chinos another and so on. We may not be able to precisely articulate the messages, but we read them quite well. If we see a woman in a tight leather sheath mini dress with straps and buckles wearing over the knee stilettos we read her as a kinky girl and not a librarian. Latex is not a normal clothing choice and it is completely associated with kinky sex, despite the mainstreaming of fetish. The mainstream is reaching into the fetish clothing to borrow its message of hot libertine sexuality.”

Scents and sensibility: In addition to the traditional scents from fetishwear materials that can arouse a wearer or the wearer’s lover I have written about an extreme fetish for the scent of ripe vaginal rubber in my entry for Sunday, August 29, 2010 entitled ‘AST and discharge fetishes.’ In this case the stench of a diaphragm or cervical cap that has been inserted in the vagina marinating continuously for 48 hours in the wearer’s cervical and vaginal fluids as well as those produced by a male during unprotected penetrative sex is ‘an acquired taste’, to quote one ripe rubber fetishist. It goes along with some women’s craving to have a physical barrier protecting their upper reproductive tract. Unlike encasement suits a cervical barrier has practical value since it will protect the wearer from water or air being forced into her uterus during dive-sex in addition to contraceptive protection during her fertile days. Silicone devices will develop a somewhat less pungent odor than the sinus clearing stench of latex left to cure in the vagina for 48 to 72 hours because latex is slightly porous and its chemical composition reacts more easily with the wearer’s body fluids.

Identity destruction by encasement: J “But latex is often worn as enclosure [encasement] suits... and these, like no garment seen on main street, completely cover the person including their face and their hair. The person inside the suit has given up their individuality to become a form with no personal identity. Of course with eye and mouth openings and perhaps a hair tube this reduces the individual's identity to these three features and with make up even these can become almost "generic"... almost like a doll. Many find this identity destruction liberating. It allows their kinky sexuality to be expressed but not as their normal self. The new kinky persona emerges encased in latex, free to be an erotic creature with no reference to their former self. This is a powerful vacation or escape for many people. Sex itself is an escape or vacation for most people from their mundane lives, but this takes that notion to a whole other level. You encase yourself in a latex enclosure suit and you are (and are perceived to be) a completely different persona... and one who is about sex in no uncertain terms. The message is clear and unambiguous. I am enjoying a sexual experience simply by what I have chosen to wear. The mental constructs of protection which are somewhat true for liquids and gases (most suits do let air and gas through zips and openings) are more about protecting the old / vanilla person and revealing one who's identity is protected and he or she is much like every other latex enclosed person - a sexual object. This is the message of enclosure that the person has subordinated their entire persona to being a sexual object.”

“All those who are enclosed feel the very same thing as their entire bodies are engaged by the tight fitting stretch material covering every inch of their skin. Latex enclosurists obsess on their garments and how they are fit despite the stretchy nature of the material. Some prefer thicker which actually is more restrictive and functions like a full body support hose. And some prefer very thick and restrictive for more bondage oriented personalities. Others lust after a very thin suit which is tailored to their exact form and curves and literally fits like a second skin (breast forms penis sheaths) like a full body condom offering all the sensitivity that a condom is supposed to provide while offering a barrier. Some seek a suit with no zippers… which don't stretch and one maker has produced a suit which one enters through an open faced hood to provide an almost seamless suit. Molded anatomical hoods can be made to fit the complex shape of the face much better than glued ones. Technology for enclosure is advancing and even very stretchy silicone is being offered. Enhancements for breasts and so forth can be included either as foam or inflatable. Suiting up is primarily for the wearer unless it is done only for the partner who demands such. When both are eroticized by enclosure of one or both partners the match is even more powerful.”

“However, not everyone is eroticized by latex enclosure and identity destruction and role play. Most find it uncomfortable after a short time, though they want to extend it. Fetish is about the arousal phase more so than the orgasm and extending and amplifying arousal is what kink seems to be. When people open themselves to a wide range of arousal experiences their sex feels more adventuresome and expansive. They feel and in a sense are masters of sexual play. But not everyone can sexualize all that anyone can! We are individuals with our sexuality derived from our biology, health condition, psychological influences and those of society and our peer group.”

Ripple Gripping - the tutorial

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