Getting the most from your diaphragm

 

A silicone Caya contoured diaphragm

Repetition: I know I’ve covered this before, but I’m being repeatedly asked about how to get the most from the few styles of contraceptive diaphragms that are still available.

The Photo: The Caya contoured diaphragm was designed to fit women who take the four most often prescribed sizes of traditional diaphragms; 65mm, 70, 75, and 80mm. Caya has a polymer rim spring so there is no worry about wearing it through metal detectors at airports and the slightly matte outer surface of the cervix cup increases a partner’s sensation rubbing against the glans of his thrusting penis. The six bumps on the right side of the rim are grip dimples. There is an identical set on the other side that make gripping and compressing a slippery rim for insertion much easier than the smooth rim of a traditional diaphragm. The dome on the right is the removal dome into which the wearer inserts a finger to break the seal and pull it out.

Disadvantages of the Caya: Women with vaginas smaller than 65mm and larger than 80mm cannot safely wear it. The heat transfer properties of silicone are not as good as latex and in larger vaginas the relief arch tends to rotate a few degrees one way or the other. If rotation is too great the Caya rim can be under-thrust which the relief arch was designed to prevent. Since I am at the upper design limit for the Caya I’m reluctant to wear it for “flood insurance” during underwater sex.

A silicone Milex contraceptive diaphragm

The Photo: The last of the traditional diaphragms still commercially available Milex comes in two rim styles, Arcing and Omniflex (coil spring) rim. It is available in eight diameter sizes, from 60 to 95mm, in 5mm increments. The wide seal flange on the inside of the rim provides a larger surface to seal against the vaginal walls. The two cut-outs in the wide seal indicate where the fingers should be placed to compress the arcing rim for insertion. While the Omniflex (coil spring) rim has the same cutouts the Omniflex can be compressed at any two opposite points on the rim for insertion. The dark round spot in the inside center of the dome is the extrusion nub.

Properly cared for a Milex diaphragm will last several times longer than a latex diaphragm. However, it is still susceptible to deterioration from oils of all kinds as well as silicone lubricants. The stiff silicone dome has much poorer heat transfer properties than does the dome of a latex diaphragm.

One of my latex Reflexions flat spring diaphragms

The Photo: One of my 80mm latex Reflections flat spring rim diaphragms in its case. The curved white polymer device lying above the diaphragm is an ‘introducer’ which aided with insertion of diaphragms with rims of 60mm to 90mm for women with short fingers. 

A major advantage of the latex flat spring over the Caya is that when correctly fitted and properly inserted it is almost impossible for even a mischievous partner to intentionally under-thrust the rim. Other advantages are that silicone lubes can be safely used with a latex diaphragm and the heat transfer properties of the translucent stretchy latex dome are far superior to silicone diaphragms. Another advantage that isn’t generally talked about is that for women with partners who are able to thrust into their anterior fornix a flat spring rim, since it only bends in the plane of the rim, will retain its shape and allow the latex dome to be stretched tight over the tip of the cervix and deep into the anterior fornix. This puts upward pressure on the cervix and therefore the uterus pushing it a few millimeters deeper which makes the bottom of the fornix that much deeper as well.  This cannot be duplicated with Milex and Caya diaphragms because the Milex rims (arcing and coil spring) bend in two planes and the Caya cervix cup is too deep to allow the cervix to be pushed upward by a penis thrusting into the anterior fornix. Another advantage of a Reflexions latex diaphragm is that the raised triangle (with the size of the device in millimeters in its center) on the outside center of the dome can stimulate the glans of a thrusting penis long enough to reach it.

Disadvantages of latex diaphragms: The latex can be easily damaged by oils of all kinds in lubes, vaginal meds and even by perfume on the fingers during insertion. Even when properly cared for a well-used (3+ times a week) latex diaphragm should be replaced every year. The rim of a Reflexions is stiffer to compress and hold (when slippery) for insertion than the Caya and a latex device will develop an odor quicker than a silicone one because the surface of the latex is porous to a small extent.  The odor   developing quicker is seen by scent fetishes as a plus.

However, the main problem with latex diaphragms is that they are no longer commercially available.  I’m fortunate to still have several new Reflexions that I haven’t broken the seals on the boxes, so I should be fine for a while longer. Currently only at Gyn practices specializing in cervical barriers can women be fitted for latex diaphragms custom made with coil, arcing or flat spring rims.

Expressing a diaphragm: For the best protection, a diaphragm should develop a strong seal (suction) in the dome. This seal depends on the flexibility of the vaginal walls with no major irregularities to grip a properly sized and correctly placed rim. A diaphragm with poor suction can be used fairly effectively with plenty of spermicide in the dome, but not as effectively as with strong suction. There is nothing more satisfying to me, from a safety perspective, than to feel the strong suction tug as I break the seal to remove my diaphragm at least six hours after the last act of intercourse (to make sure all his little swimmers are dead) from a long session of love making.

To get the strongest suction possible a wearer should express the air out of the dome or cervical cup with her fingers. Where the most air will accumulate under the dome is in the anterior fornix. The wider the anterior fornix the more air is trapped. Because of the smaller cervix cup there is less air to express from a Caya than a conventional diaphragm dome. Some women can press down and lower the cervix enough that the wearer can express all the air from her anterior fornix with her fingers. But when using fingers there is the possibility of cutting or tearing the dome with a fingernail. Others find it helpful to use a small dildo or the rounded handle of a table knife to force the dome into the anterior fornix to completely evacuate the air. It’s especially important if the wearer is using a diaphragm as “flood insurance” during dive-sex so the hydraulics of a partner’s thrusts will not force water into the wearer’s uterus.   

The Caya diaphragm, Tim and I, fetish diaphragm sex

The Caya single size contoured diaphragm

The Caya market: The Caya contoured diaphragm with a polymer arcing spring rim was designed for use in locations where medical professionals are not available to fit diaphragms. Caya is a one-size-fits-most device designed to fit women using the four most commonly prescribed sizes 65, 70, 75 and 80mm, of conventional diaphragms. Caya has been available in The UK and Europe for about two years and in mid 2015 was approved by the FDA for use in the U.S, but it is available by Rx only.

I’ve discussed the Caya and its uses in previous posts and occasionally use it myself when I’m luteal, but I don’t think it is as effective for me if used for contraception during fetish sex as it can be more easily under-thrust than can a flat spring rim latex diaphragm which my clinic now fits as standard for Escorts unless the patient is allergic to latex. 

Caya the pros:

• Polymer rim spring compresses into a long oval with the posterior rim arcing down slightly to ease slipping under and behind the cervix. The rims flexing properties are very similar to a conventional coil spring rim.
• Designed to fit women who wear conventional diaphragms from 65mm to 80mm.
• The soft 75 mm polymer rim spring flexes to accommodate depth of 65mm conventional diaphragm wearer.
• Matte texture of the cup increases sensation for the male partner.
• Grip dimples provide finger placement guidance and firm grip for insertion.
• Removal dome makes removal easy. And, depending on the length of the fingers it can also allow the wearer’s or her partner’s finger to easily move the removal dome gently back and forth over the wearer’s G-spot (if she has one) to stimulate her to orgasm making it much easier to give many women who can wear a Caya a G-spot orgasm, though the ease will depend on exactly where her G-spot is located.
• Relief arch makes it less likely for a partner to hit the anterior rim.

And cons:

• The small 55 mm, inner diameter cervical cup makes wearing it for heavy days flow control during menses less useful than an Omniflex that has a larger dome.
• To accommodate the upturned relief arch of the anterior rim in front of the removal dome, the wearer needs to have a pronounced post-pubic vault (or retropubic niche as  the makers call it) one to two cm deep which most women have; otherwise a partner can hit the rim.
• Rim contour (ahead of the grip dimples) increases the likelihood of under-thrusting if the Caya rotates too much.
• Worn by a woman whose correct size in a conventional diaphragm is smaller than 65mm the contoured rim will bend more ahead of the grip dimples making it much easier to under-thrust the Caya if the wearer is taken while unaroused. Or, cause it not to seal correctly and leak and the rim pressing on her urethra can increase the likelihood of developing a UTI.
• All cervical barriers rotate, but for those with a circular cross-section (all except Caya) rotation doesn’t matter as far as the seal is concerned. When Caya rotates the contoured rim is more likely to break the seal. Rotation is thought to occur from a thrusting penis rubbing more against one side of the dome than the other. So if both the penis and dome are not well lubricated friction can cause the device to rotate significantly.

Tim and a change in plan: It’s Monday January 4^th 2016 and I’m CD24 as this is being written. I’m luteal and don’t really need to wear a barrier for contraception, but I found that Tim likes to help me insert either a Caya or a Reflexions if we are to go diving (I check after him to make certain my cervix is in the cup) and he loves the additional stimulation from rubbing his glans on Caya’s lightly textured dome which saves me from having to intentionally contract my muscles and lets me just enjoy having him thrusting inside me.

The plan changes are significant. After 12^th Night (on January 5^th) my wards their boyfriends and Anya, who arrived on Sunday as the last of my house party guests were departing will fly down to Virgin Gorda aboard Limnaea II, my. Marvin is not going. He is returning to Cambridge to “work” and ‘Miss Nexplanon’ his current dick-a-chick is going with him! I’m not surprised, but she isn’t a dancer and can’t wear pointe shoes (I’ve already covered that base and she doesn’t have the feet or strength for wearing them) so she won’t be replacing me as Jenna when I’m wearing her Bloch Alpha pointes.  Marvin is just looking for a young, tight, deep, easily controlled vessel in which to plant his seed while he is away from me so I know he will be back.

And, I’m not going to Virgin Gorda immediately after 12^th Night either. I found that Tim doesn’t have to report back to his unit for another two weeks, on the 18^th, and I’ve asked him to stay here with me which he is delighted to do! Yay! I should be fertile on the 16^th so I’ll need to be careful the last several days we will be together, but until then I can safely have his sperm in my tubes and not worry about an unintended pregnancy.

By then Bea and her boyfriend will be back at Cambridge so after I see Tim off Nikolai and I will fly down to Lost Cove to be with Anya and the Dryads (Bryony and Claire) and their boyfriends. Nikolai will have time off from the ballet then so he will be my partner on Virgin Gorda. It will be his first time in the BVIs and we are both looking forward to having dive-sex in the cove.

Tiny Tim and me: For the next two weeks Tim and I will be alone together except of course for the castle staff.  He has had SCUBA combat training so is well qualified as a diver. Though I’m pretty sure he hasn’t been in an operation where he has had penile-vaginal intercourse with a woman underwater before. So, I intend to give him a lot of practice to eliminate that gap in his training. We slipped away from the rest of my guests on Saturday to have Carla, my Divemaster, fit him with an OTS Guardian FFM and we tried it out wearing BCs and 130 cu ft HP steel tanks in the shallow (64 ft deep) well where just to get acclimated to the energy and the amount of air expended (you tend to forget about air conservation techniques during orgasm) during dive-sex we could breathe regular air rather than Enriched Air Nitrox with 32% oxygen (EAN32). I tethered my ankle leash to the net strung across the well at 30 feet to prevent a diver in an uncontrolled descent from sinking to the bottom.

I inflated my BC and hung weightless tethered by the leash while Tim untied the hip bows of my thong and fingered me. For the dive I wore a latex Reflexions flat spring diaphragm making sure to express the air from the dome with my fingers to strengthen the vacuum in the dome and applied 10ml of the silicone lube DiveGel+ from a disposable vaginal applicator before getting in the water. I wore the latex Reflections for two reasons primarily because a flat spring rim is nearly impossible to under-thrust so it performs extremely well as ‘flood insurance’ to prevent the hydraulics of a lover’s thrusting from forcing water into the wearer’s uterus and because the silicone gel lube needed for underwater sex will not harm a latex barrier.

He was such an able and fast learner! On our first dive he got off twice by thrusting while we were in more or less vertical missionary. Then I gave him Pompoir while he stayed still and hard as deep as he could get while I milked him with my muscles. It was such a wonderful encounter that I hated to have to surface. The good news is that he will be with me for the next two weeks!