Death Rubber Diary Pt. II

A latex Reflexions flat spring diaphragm with its case and introducer

 The Photo: One of my 80mm latex Reflexions flat spring rim contraceptive diaphragms showing the size in mm in a raised triangle in the center of the convex side of the dome. The raised size on the outside makes a great stimulator for a lover’s glans rubbing against it in missionary. The Introducer was an insertion aid for short fingered women.

The “death rubber” diaphragm: Returning readers may recall my post on April 25, 2016 entitled Death Rubber Diary in which I recorded the acquisition of my latest “death rubber” contraceptive diaphragm. It has been almost eleven months since I added to my collection. Since I wear them as often as possible I’m always on the lookout for replacements as after a few months the older ones begin to develops thin spots, pin holes and cracks around the rim from heavy use.

For readers who are new to my blog a ‘death rubber’ diaphragm, especially a latex one, is one that was being worn by a woman when she died while having penetrative intercourse. So, readers can understand how difficult it can be obtaining a death rubber diaphragm under ideal conditions, meaning that I am able to harvest it myself.

Residual Chi: During an orgy in Vegas years ago, I found that wearing a latex diaphragm, the first one I personally harvested, from the vagina of an elite rubber fetish escort – a woman I watched die while being fucked at the bottom of a training pool for rubber fetishists - gave me access through the residual Chi (the fundamental life force that flowed through her) contained in the diaphragm that had been protecting her cervix. Through that residual amount of her Chi her memories of past lovers and the pelvic experience and tricks she knew to please them became available for my use which enhanced my confidence and pleasure when wearing it.

As a result, I have a data mining firm searching medical records for potential donors, women who wear 80mm latex flat spring rim diaphragms. Those I’ve found are primarily dancers, up-market fetish escorts and porn actresses. It so happens these are the women who are some of the greatest risk takers so are the ones most likely to have a fatal accident during an encounter with a commercial client or during filming porn videos commonly recorded as death by misadventure. I think the risk is part of my fascination with asphyxia sexual highs while having SCUBA sex because there is so little margin for error. It certainly is a huge thrill and marvelous high for me!

Challenges in collecting this specific item:

•           Few women use diaphragms these days.

•           The device needs to be in my size, 80mm – usually worn by women much taller than me.

•           The woman has to have died during sex while wearing it.

•           And so, I can safely wear it she must have been free of STIs which means at the time of her death she had had a recent negative full panel STI test.

•           And now the Reflexions – latex flat spring rim diaphragm - is no longer being made. However, latex flat spring diaphragms can be custom made for those of us who need them.

Too there is the usual down side to a latex device:

•           Some people are allergic to latex.

•           The useful life is much shorter than a silicone diaphragm.

•           The odor from a latex device worn too long (usually more than 24 hours) can be very strong, however, that can be a plus if you are with a man who is into funky vaginal scents.

The good news about a latex flat spring device is:

•           The heat transfer properties are far superior to silicone.

•           A latex device can be safely used with silicone lubes necessary for proper vaginal lubrication during underwater sex.

•           A wonderful safety feature of a flat spring rim diaphragm is that since it folds in a single plane it is almost impossible for even the most mischievous partner to under-thrust the rim of one that is properly sized and correctly placed.                         

Until a few days ago, my collection was down to three (down from six when I last wrote about them) all 80mm latex diaphragms that I have personally harvested from the vaginas of their previous owners. I try to take good care of them since (as I mentioned above) they all contain their former owner’s sexual exploits that reside in the portion of her Chi still contained in the diaphragm which supplement my own sexual knowledge and experiences when I wear them and each is unique and irreplaceable in that way.

My latest harvesting acquisition: This is the third ‘death rubber’ I’ve harvested since I moved to the UK in January of 2015. It belonged to a rather tall (for a dancer) American 19 y/o (I’ll call Terri) in the corps of a major U.S ballet company who was on holiday with her French lover. Tim and I were at a costume party at a country house in Kent hosted on a neighboring estate near Headlong Hall the seat of Lord A****, my ward Bryony’s father. Tim and I were guests of Lord A**** and were invited to attended With Bryony, her step-mother Brigitte and Lord A****.

Until the house party I knew Terri only as a candidate on my list of possible Death Rubber donors as she was quite tall at 5’8” and even though she had a standard (6 bead) GyneFix copper IUD implanted she had been fitted by one of Tanaquil’s Gyn friends in Paris with custom made latex FS in my size. She told her fitter that she needed the 80mm for thrust buffering as her lover was very large and she wanted to slow him down when he was sounding the depth of her anterior fornix. She also mentioned that the dome would make a good container as he liked eating her fertile cervical mucus that could be collected in the dome. She was lovely and vivacious and friends who had known her longer said she was very talented ballerina.

It was late at night and Tim and I were in a bedroom adjacent to where Terri was sleeping. We heard several loud thumps and a few moments later a man shouting for help. There had been a freak accident during sex while she was being taken doggie style, on all fours penetrated from the rear on her bed. It seems she had been kneeling too close to the solid oak headboard. When her French lover came. At orgasm his violent thrusts drove her head into the oak panel several times and broke her neck. The doctor who arrived more than an hour later said she died almost immediately as her spine was severed.

While we waited for the doctor to arrive everyone except Bryony and I went for coffee and tried to calm her boyfriend who had come completely unglued. When her lover had withdrawn, Terri had toppled on to her side with her legs still pulled up so her vulva was easily accessible. I helped Bryony lay a clean sheet over her during which time I inserted two fingers and withdrew her diaphragm filled with fertile mucus and inserted it in a small plastic freezer bag I carry for just such an occasion. I know that sounds ghoulish, but this sort of opportunity hardly ever occurs and I need to be prepared if I’m nearby.  

A bit later the unpredictability of death during sexual intercourse, the act that can lead to new life, and the very thing I routinely risk for the adrenalin high I get from the danger suddenly seemed very real standing next to Terri’s cooling body. Having harvested her diaphragm for my use was a huge turn-on and I found myself suddenly extremely aroused and in need of a man!

Death Rubber diary

A latex Reflexions flat spring diaphragm

The photo: One of my 80mm Reflexions diaphragms. It is made of natural rubber latex and is the style that when worn by a woman when she died during sexual intercourse becomes (for my purposes) a ‘Death Rubber’ diaphragm containing special powers that supplement my sexuality. I know I use photos of Reflexions a lot, but I can’t stress enough how desirable they are for contraceptive and dive-sex safety and for their strong appeal to latex fetishists.

My Death Rubber collection:  For readers who are new to my blog a ‘death rubber’ is a diaphragm, especially a latex one, which was being worn by a woman when she died while having penetrative intercourse. Until my last post (Dating Gigi on May 2, 2015) I hadn’t written about harvesting one for about five months - in my entry for November 21, 2014 - when I harvested one from a Las Vegas Towel Girl at Splash. As this is written it has been eleven months since I added to my collection so readers can understand how difficult it is to obtain a Death Rubber under ideal conditions, meaning that I harvested it myself.

During an orgy in Vegas years ago I found that wearing a latex diaphragm I harvested from the vagina of an elite rubber fetish escort – one I watched die while being fucked at the bottom of a training pool for rubber fetishists - gave me access to the residual Chi contained in the diaphragm that had been protecting her cervix. Through her Chi her memories of past lovers and the pelvic experience and tricks she knew to please them become available for my use which enhances my confidence and pleasure when wearing it.

There are some challenges in collecting this specific item:

• Few women use diaphragms these days.
• The device needs to be in my size, 80mm – usually worn by women much taller than me.
• The woman has to have died during sex while wearing it.
• And so I can safely wear it she must have been free of STIs which means at the time of her death she had had a recent negative full panel STI test.
• And now the Reflexions is no longer being made. However, latex flat spring diaphragms can be custom made for those of us who need them.

Too there is the usual down side to a latex device:

• Some people are allergic to latex.
• The useful life is much shorter than a silicone diaphragm.
• The odor from a latex device worn too long can be very strong, however, that could be a plus if you are with a man who is into funky vaginal scents.

The good news about a latex flat spring device is:

• The heat transfer properties are far superior to silicone.
• A latex device can be safely used with silicone lubes necessary for proper vaginal lubrication during underwater sex.
• A great safety feature of a flat spring rim diaphragm is that since it folds in a single plane it is almost impossible for a mischievous partner to under-thrust the rim of one that is properly sized and correctly placed.                         

Fortunately as with my former position in Vegas I have access to the medical records of the Escort service run by Tanaquil for Taryn’s European operation so I know who wears 80mm latex diaphragms (mainly for male clients with latex fetishes) or for under-thrust ‘flood insurance’ during dive-sex. It so happens these are the women who are the greatest risk takers so are the ones most likely to have a fatal accident during an encounter with a commercial client or during filming porn videos. I think the risk is part of my fascination with asphyxia sexual highs while having SCUBA sex because there is so little margin for error. It certainly is a huge thrill and marvelous high for me!

A more recent and serious ‘Death Rubber’ limitation briefly mentioned above is that the Reflexions FS diaphragm was discontinued at the first of 2015. Fortunately the Clinic had received a routine stocking order of the Reflexions so we should be able to provide them to patients for the next few months as they are how only used by up-market fetish escort clients. Also, we are able to have latex FS diaphragms custom made, but at higher cost. The fall-back position is to use 80mm silicone Milex diaphragms as death rubber devices, but the flat spring rim was ideal in providing women and especially fetish escorts with superior under-thrust protection and I suspect those of us in the profession will go to the custom made latex flat spring as for us there really is nothing as good.

Currently my collection consists of six 80mm latex Reflexions diaphragms that I have personally harvested from the vaginas of their previous owners. I try to take good care of them as they all contain their former owners sexual exploits that reside in the portion of her Chi still contained in the diaphragm which supplement my own sexual knowledge and experiences when I wear them and each is unique and irreplaceable in that way.

My latest harvesting acquisition: This is the second ‘death rubber’ I’ve harvested since I moved to the UK in January of 2015. The most recent was a French twenty-something ballerina on holiday with her English lover who was at a fetish swim party at a country house in Berkshire which I attended last weekend. I knew her as a candidate on my list of possible Death Rubber donors as she was quite tall at 5’8” for a ballet dancer. She had been fitted by one of Tanaquil’s Gyn friends in Paris and wore the Reflexions FS in my size. She said she was familiar with basic SCUBA gear and was anxious to have her lover take her to orgasm submerged in our host’s pool while other guests watched. Her lover was against it as she was known as something of an exhibitionist, but she teased him about not being able to get it up underwater and so to defend his sexual prowess he reluctantly agreed.

They were using our hosts OTS Guardian FFMs, 60 cu ft aluminum tanks and everything seemed to be going well. The woman was tethered to the bottom of the dive well with an ankle leash and she was out of her tank which was on its side on the bottom so she could be entered from behind. The audio from their comm. link was on the speakers in the pool area so we could hear them talk to each other and both of them gasp and moan from their sexual exertions. She was facing the pool bottom as he entered her from the rear and she grunted, mewed, gasped and moaned as he pushed his way inside her and she adjusted her hips to take his length and thrusts.  He was holding on to her hips and had given her several vaginal orgasms when she began to quiver, gasp and begin to gag and she doubled over possibly to try to unfasten the ankle leash or perhaps from cramps, but her partner kept thrusting into her trying to reach orgasm himself before he withdrew. 

After he came he pulled out, but by that time she was limp and not breathing and I and several other divers had jumped in to help pull her out. I unfastened the ankle leash, a man lifted her tank off the bottom and her partner raised her to the surface. After we got her on the pool surround we tried CPR, but she had apparently drowned in her own vomit.  While straightening her thong and covering her with a blanket to await an ambulance I pulled out the 80mm Reflexions she was wearing still slippery with her lover’s thick creamy semen that hadn’t had a chance to liquefy and slipped it down my cleavage.

She had the results of a serum pregnancy test in her purse that showed she was about eight weeks pregnant so that may have been why she became nauseated though there were two other women at the party who came down with food poisoning so perhaps it was that.

Death rubber harvesting from a SL-17B diver

A Kirby Morgan SuperLite SL-17B helmet

The photo: A Kirby Morgan SuperLite-17B fiberglass diving helmet. It’s the one both Adolph and I use for surface supplied diving and it weights 29 lbs out of the water. Under water the three weights, port. Starboard and rear, come factory adjusted to balance the helmet and provide neutral buoyancy.  Even so I like wearing a beavertail jacket with it for shoulder padding as before entering the water you have to put on the yoke/neck dam assembly and then wait while a tender helps with attaching the helmet and its heavy.

Surface supplied diving: I can have a maximum of four surface supplied divers in my 64 ft deep pool at one time and Adolph can have a maximum of eight in his 216 ft deep training facility. With that many hoses it can get a bit crowded and the divers have to watch they don’t get their umbilicals tangled.

For some reason Adolph has recently had his trainees (all women) wear Kirby Morgan SL-17B helmets for a lot of their dive-sex training rather than the usual SCUBA tank, reg and mask gear. There are some advantages to training in surface supplied helmets the main one I think being there are no bulky tanks on the diver’s back, just an emergency gas supple (EGS) pony bottle and associated reg in case the surface supply is interrupted and also the defog/free flow valve that puts cool dry air against the port window. However, I think that’s offset by the need for the diver to wear a safety harness so s/he can be pulled to the surface as the long heavy umbilical with air hose comm. link and  supporting cable is far too heavy to allow a diver in trouble to get to the surface on his or her own unless s/he has a remotely controlled lift and is able to operate it so it requires dive tenders.

Given Adolph’s recent increased interest in dive-sex while wearing SL-17B helmets – perhaps because he is being asked to train women for dive-sex in surface fed helmets - I’ve been having my divemaster train Kassi and her partner(s) in that style dive gear which takes some custom prep for each diver to ensure the neck dam fits well and is worn correctly otherwise there can be serious problems such as what recently happened to a lovely blonde Aryan escort trainee that Tanaquil had sent him for deep-water dive-sex training.   

Neck dam leak: She was wearing a latex over-the-head skirted hood to protect her hair (like a lot of us do) that had to be stretched over the head to put it on. That’s because even with a correctly sized neck dam a back-zip hood would cause it to leak along the zipper where the neck dam sealed against the wearer’s neck. Her EGS cylinder valve was turned off as was the EGS valve on her helmet and she was wearing her beavertail jacket incorrectly - over the hood skirt rather than under it so what seems to have happened is the neck dam did not seal properly because of the seams and zipper irregularities in the neck of the wetsuit jacket. Perhaps that wouldn’t have been a problem by itself, but she hadn’t opened the valve on her EGS pony bottle and when there was a surface supple failure she couldn’t reach the valve to turn it on.

At that point the one-way (non-return) valve failed and with no pressure in the hose drained her helmet of air. If the neck dam hadn’t leaked she may have been killed by the vacuum (squeeze) in her helmet. But the vacuum in the helmet sucked water up through the neck irregularities - seams and zipper track - of the beavertail against which the neck dam was sealing rather than against the smooth hood. The inexperienced diver being unable to reach the valve on her EGS supply was left to drown when her helmet filled with water. Adolph and the drowned girl were operating at the 100 ft level on the safety net, but w/o tenders so Adolph watched her drown while getting off inside her, not that there was anything he could have done when everything went wrong.

I harvest a SL-17B death rubber: When Tanaquil’s trainee drowned Adolph called me to retrieve her body. He knew I had fitted her with a latex Reflexions flat spring diaphragm (an 80mm just my size) for upper reproductive tract flood protection and he knew I would want to harvest her diaphragm since he had been fucking her when she drowned which made her diaphragm a ‘death rubber’. Returning readers may recall I wear death rubber diaphragms because they give me access to all the previous owner’s experiences through the portion of her Chi that remains in the device she was wearing for sexual protection when she died. When I found her on the net at 100 feet he hadn’t covered her in any way.

The beavertail of her jacket was still tucked up on her back under the weight belt and her legs were spread so I had no problem in inserting two fingers, hooking the rim and pulling out her diaphragm which was slippery with Adolph’s liquefied semen. I slipped my new death rubber into a mesh bag on my equipment belt then fastened her beavertail with its twist latches so she was presentable before attaching her harness to a lift cable and winching her out of the pool.    

When we removed her helmet we found the neck clamp hadn’t been forced shut, but as I mentioned above the surface of the wetsuit didn’t provide the good seal that sealing against the latex hood would have, thus allowing water to fill the vacuum in her helmet when she lost surface supply pressure.

Afterward: Tanaquil was really upset at losing such a promising escort for whom she had great plans.  The body was cremated and her ashes were sent back to Munich where Tanaquil keeps the ashes of other girls w/o families she has lost due to accidents while in her employ. To minimize the likelihood of accidents when Kassi goes to dive her SL-17B with Adolph I’m sending along my divemaster as her tender.

Forcing Kassi’s period, an update: Returning readers may recall that on Tuesday Oct 7 she took her first 5mg Norethindrone tablet. She continued for nine more days stopping on Oct 16th when I was CD27. That caused her to spot on the 17th and start bleeding (her new CD1) on Saturday the 18th when we all were CD1. Rescheduling a period doesn’t always work so well and we have yet to see if she will stay synched with the rest of us, but we are off to a good start

The 2014 Vernal Equinox and Roman engineering

Stacks of peat drying near where they were cut

Roman engineering: On the way up to the Holy site Jack said he had a surprise for me. When we got there I found he had cleared back the Gorse all the way past the ring of standing stones and in the process had uncovered an additional part of what he is calling the altar warming system. It seems the stone fire pits aren’t symmetrical and each has a top lip the height of which varies, the lowest part, by several inches while several feet wide along the pits circumference, and is closest to the altar which it is nearest to. Jack said that from the tight fit of the dry stone building technique he thinks the site heating system was built by the Romans about the time they built the temple to Venus-Aphrodite now under and part of the foundation of Crag Abbey which overlooks Loch Ness.

But that wasn’t the most fascinating part. What is amazing to me is that all around the circumference of the site just outside the ring of standing stones is a wind baffle, a ridge of four foot high ten foot long four foot thick stones. The surface of these stones that faces away from the altars and standing stones was fashioned with a concave taper of about 45° so it catches the wind flowing across the site and directs it downward into a series of channels under the surface of the site which directs the air across the fire in each of the twenty fire pits.

This results in a sort of bellows effect providing plenty of oxygen to each fire in the pits. There are baffles that decrease the speed of the air through the tunnels when the wind is blowing directly into them and the fire draws air through the tunnels when the wind strength isn’t very strong. I think of the fire pits and their air supply as set of large prehistoric hair dryers, which isn’t scientific, but the description really fits as each pit puts out a stream of hot air directed at the altar which it is closest to.

Jack said most of his and a crew of six workers from His Grace’s nearby estates, time was spent uncovering the air ducts cleaning them of animal nests and storm debris, fitting intake covers of coarse heavy screen that will block small animals and vegetable debris, but not hinder air flow too severely and replacing the stone covers which are the paving stones within the circle of standing stones.

Fire pit testing: Jack and I loaded the four fire pits surrounding the main altar with peat blocks brought up in a cart from several large stacks under tarps in the supply area just below the holy site. I had tested the incineration powder back at home and it worked well, but the girls and I would be risking being badly burned if there were embers and sparks that came off the fires, which is what the incineration powder was designed to prevent by causing every bit of combustible material to be totally consumed leaving only pure hot air rising off the fire. So I sprinkled the peat with the incineration powder to see if it worked when we need it to. Fortunately it worked even better than I’d hoped and even the North altar that is missing one of it’s fire pits, some of the stone ducting and the nearest several standing stones seemed to be heated fairly well and with Odile being a sadist with masochistic tendencies when the time cane she handled it well remembering the heavy robes and the cold of the Solstice.  

The celebration: At sunrise, 6:02 AM GMT (Daylight time in the UK doesn’t start until Sunday March 30^th.) we were all on our respective altars. I was wearing Aphrodite’s gold Amulet, the smaller one, which is several thousand years old that I think of as ‘field-jewelry’ and my badge of office rather than the much larger and heavier Necklace of State for formal occasions when I’m not working on my back.

We had all chosen to celebrate on the altars we occupied for the Winter Solstice. I on the main, Willow had chosen to consecrate initiates on the Eastern altar because it’s closest to the rising sun then Bea on the South, Odette on the Western altar and Odile on the Northern one. The heat had dried the paving stones in the altar area so the pink satin pointes that the girls and I wore: Block Alpha shoes for Bea, Willow and me and Freed Classics with Forteflex shanks for the Swan twins amazingly didn’t get wet at all. The goddess must have approved of our footwear as all our penetrative encounters went well and all the boys’ semen dripped on our shoes as they withdrew. The satin of mine was wonderfully stained and slippery wet with semen. It’s a pity the shoes worn during the celebration were all burnt.

The initiates under Jacks supervision had brought up stacks of peat blocks and covered them with tarps next to the fire pits and lit the fires at 5:45 AM. The ones not engaged in initiation rites on the altars were also charged with keeping the fire pits filled with fresh peat. It was 30° F and had been snowing heavily at that elevation, but stopped just before sunrise. Even so the extremely flammable and hot burning nature of the incineration powder started the peat and had kept it burning completely in the snow. The roar of the fire, the howling wind, the hiss of the snow being turned to steam before it could wet the peat and Jack shouting orders to the initiates to keep the pits stocked with peat and a red glow of the fires reflecting off the clouds we were just beneath gave the site within the standing stones with its bare chested men stoking fires and nude women the look of an erotic view of hell. 

Female pelvic power: The altar surfaces had been dried by the warm air flowing over them by the time we all took our places. We priestess in out new shearling robes were if anything too warm and I lay with mine open since with its hood it made a wonderfully soft bed on the hard stone altar, while my initiates mounted me and I sucked them dry while they gasped, moaned and called for their mothers. The young men who were welcomed into the old ways through me and my demi-priestesses were, through our bodies, being ritually taken by Aphrodite to teach them the joy of sex with a woman so they will crave the intimacy of melding two spirits into one at the moment of simultaneous orgasms.   It is unlikely that any of the initiated will ever again experience sex with a woman who has as tight a vagina as the loosest of us has, but that gives the men a reason to hope and spread their seed widely during their search.

Afterward: As a final offering to Aphrodite Himself mounted me while everyone else watched. I was gentle with him and gave him a good ride and we had several gentle orgasms that his heart could stand (I could have easily excited him to the extent that he died of heart failure while he was in my saddle) before he pulled out and was helped off me to declare the ceremony over. His need to’ tear off the last piece’ has become a fixture of these celebrations now and it is as much a display of his virility for all to see as it is for his pleasure and to torment Jack that he can have sex with Jack’s woman when he wants. And, he has cleverly codified the activity by routinely dipping his wick in me the last four times I’ve been Priestess while he claims he is rededicating himself to the service of Aphrodite. Perhaps he is. It doesn’t really matter as we both have fun and his position is unassailable.

The celebratory party left the Holy site and traveled to His Graces hunting lodge where we had a full English breakfast and I got to have carnal knowledge of a number of the older boys who had been initiated by my wards. They all seemed so amazed and appreciative that when they began to wilt I ripple-gripped them to sexually exhaust each one. After that small orgy there was the ritual burning of the priestesses’ fleece robes and pointe shoes then the initiates were all taken back to their respective villages to spread the word about having sex with tight pussy Goddesses on a mountain top surrounded by snow. No one off His Graces estates ever believes a story like that, but it builds interest in some of the other young ones for the next time which will be the 2014 Summer Solstice.

Crag Abbey: The girls and I and our support staff, Chris, our Gyn, and our dressers are now back at Crag Abby with Jack and His Grace for a few days rest before heading back home. I’m glad we left Ullapool when we did as they are calling for icy roads tonight and on the 21^st.  For the last three hours I’ve been down in the Roman temple to Aphrodite which returning readers will remember is behind the chapel in the undercroft of the Abby. I brought along a pair of Jenna’s Bloch Alpha pointes and one of her 70mm Milex Omniflex diaphragms and wore them down to her temple so she could see how strongly the Chi from wearing Jenna’s things affects me and to ask her how I should handle Brad. It’s not that she didn’t know how I felt costumed as Jenna when I was home, but here in her temple I feel physically closer to her. Her advice was to do what I thought best which was a relief as I had pretty much decided that on my own. But I was pleased that she thought my offering of pomegranates was acceptable and trusted my judgment.

Sex with a Succubus - the dead wife fantasy

Jenna’s Bloch Alpha S0104 ¾ outer sole pointes

The Photo: My New psychiatrist’s, dead wife, Jenna’s, size 4 ½ Bloch pointes she wore throughout her cycle except when menstrual. As I’ve mentioned in an earlier post when menstrual she wore a 5 ½ in Bloch Alphas.

The dead wife fantasy: In my experience some virile men after losing a mate to death seek solace in fantasy sex and it happens more than you might think. But they often feel guilty about cheating on the memory of their mate. Brad’s wife had been a ballet dancer with the San Francisco Ballet when they met and married while he was in med school. He has photos of her in practice clothes and costumes in his condo and she was a lovely 27 y/o with a Balanchine body (long legs and neck, short trunk, small head and breasts and relatively big feet) when she died. He has repeatedly told me how much I look like her and from the photos of her in his home I could be her identical twin.

It turns out that beautiful Brad has a very active imagination and one of his fantasies is that I’m his dead wife and when we are alone he calls me Jenna. He has given me permission to use her dressing room and bathroom in their Condo when I share his bed. And I’m encouraged if not required to wear her clothes, jewelry and perfume. Nothing in her suite had been touched, except to be dusted and her last dirty laundry was still in her hamper with her scent still on it. I went through her lingerie drawers and closets and I have very similar tastes to hers. She had nursing bras and was still breast feeding when she died so we have that in common too. And just like me she also wore LilyPadz breast pads to help with leaking nipples. 

I meet him at his Condo for our sexual and psychotherapy sessions. Jenna’s small studio with a Marley floor, barre and mirrored wall was converted from a bedroom and can be reached through a connecting door from her dressing room.  I change into her practice clothes which fit me wonderfully well, empty my bowels and bladder, insert one of her Omniflex diaphragms and my sports plug and wear her scent. I come out of her dressing room into the studio where he is waiting for me and only then put on my pointes (Jenna’s Bloch Alphas) where he can watch. All during these sessions he calls me Jenna. After a 20 minute warm-up I change into her stripping costume and back in the studio put on Beautiful Dreamer which was one of Jenna’s favorites. The routine is about 3.5 minutes long and leaves me wearing only my Alpha pointes and plug.

I had intended to wear my own pointes as she wore Bloch in a slightly smaller size and I like hard shanked Gaynors when I’m having sex on my toes since then I don’t have to worry about proper technique and can put my weight on my heels and enjoy being made love to and concentrate on timing my orgasm with my partner’s which is always special being hurled into ecstasy simultaneously. But all that changed, at least while I’m Jenna and recently when I’ve gone clubbing with Brad while dressed in her things. When I tried on her Bloch Alphas I found that I love how they fit and with the ¾ outsole how well they display my high arches! I do just a tiny glamour charm – it’s easy to do with today’s cosmetics - so to him my face and body look and feel and my voice sounds exactly like Jenna’s. When I do that he is in my power and I can do anything I want with him or to him.

His penis is massive! It's wonderfully hard and dripping pre-ejaculate when I finish stripping down to my pointes and plug. He is so ready to take me!  I let him back me against the barre, remove my sports plug and slip it into my mouth as I fondle his testicles all snugged tight against his pubic bone with one hand and caress his nipples with the other while I suck my own secretions off my sports plug before I turn, to face the barre, go on pointe in second position, bend over and grip the barre with both hands and band over and relax my pelvic muscles as much as possible while on my toes so he can enter me. Jenna was one of the few classical dancers who had started wearing plugs to intensify male interest (she was fitted at Gepettos, I checked, and she bought it 6 months before she was killed) so I wonder how faithful Jenna may have been. But I’m certainly not going to mention that to Brad. I’m using my own sports plug as each is custom made to fit the wearer’s pelvic anatomy. Sucking on my sports plug muffles my screams if he rams my cervix tip to tip.

Bloch Alpha pointes for ballet-sex: I’ve written about this before but it bears repeating as there are readers of this blog who try to imitate my use of footwear, often to their sorrow after injuring themselves. Wearing Bloch Alpha pointes for ballet-sex should not be attempted by inexperienced women. Alpha pointes are for women very experienced in pointework advanced pre-professional students or at the professional level and then only by ones with very strong feet. Brad so wants me to wear her shoes when I’m on my toes while we make love, I was skeptical, but I’m glad I agreed to try as I love wearing her shoes! She had almost finished preparing a new order of shoes with ribbons and elastics so she has almost two dozen pairs. Many have already been broken in and are ready to go.

She had lost her baby weight and regained her stamina, I can tell from the level of her Chi, so she was planning a return to performing in the near future when she died though from her aura I can tell she hadn’t told Brad she was returning to performing professionally again. I’m so entheuastic about the Alpha style I’m going to selectively put some of my wards and women escort trainees in Alphas to increase the difficulty of their training. Both Bea and Willow have Giselle feet and strong arches and Bea could use the additional challenge so I’m going to introduce both of them to the Alpha style which I think they will like.

Channeling a ghost: I wear the same scents she wore; vanilla, Chanel #5 and Shalimar. I use the heavy spicy scent sparingly mixed with my fertile musk and dab it on my pulse points a combination that ensnares men from the slightest whiff.  Her tights and leotards fit me perfectly and she had quite a few thong-back leos for practice and to play in w/o tights or with tights over her TB leo for quick access just like I do! It is scary how seemingly alike we are! It’s as though she has gone away for the weekend and I’m just taking her place temporarily. Thought of like that everything seems almost normal for a new white hot infatuation. Over time however while the intensity of Brad’s obsession has only increased my need to test his stamina and exhaust him while I’m channeling Jenna has become troubling.

When we’re alone at his place he has me dress in her clothes. Often he wants me barelegged in a thong back long sleeve turtleneck leotard and Alpha pointes as he conducts my therapy session. In her clothes and with her Milex inserted I can feel her presence guiding me and telling me the little things she did that enchanted him so, like forcing her tongue under his foreskin to caress his glans before he becomes aroused and massively erect. He is so into that fantasy when I’m kneeling between his legs with my tongue sheathed by his foreskin as I gently caress his testicles! I’m sure that my being a ballet dancer as well as a sexuality expert was why he approached me to work with him in his study of hypersexuality. He was taught by the Psychiatrist I helped years ago when he was studying habitual sexual offenders and I’m certain my name and contribution to that study came up.  

Even at my age I can easily pass for being in my very early 30s so physically there is very little difference between the in-shape 27 y/o in the photos and me as an in-shape and very well preserved 43 y/o classical ballet dancer. Except that I’m much tighter than she ever was! I was thrilled to hear that! I don’t think he intended to tell me, but it sort of slipped out between gasps the first time I ripple gripped him. When we first met I immediately sensed he was hoping for an intimate relationship as well as an assistant since he kept telling me how much I look like her. I know I’m repeating myself, but he just tells me that over and over! He says he knows he can’t bring her back, but wants so badly to relive some of their most intense times together. However, there is a much darker side to Brad’s fantasy with me being Jenna.

Jenna as a Succubus: From Wikipedia: “A succubus is a female demon or supernatural entity in folklore (traced back to medieval legend) that appears in dreams and takes the form of a human woman in order to seduce men, usually through sexual activity. The male counterpart is the incubus. Religious traditions hold that repeated sexual activity with a succubus may result in the deterioration of health or even death.

In modern fictional representations, a succubus may or may not appear in dreams and is often depicted as a highly attractive seductress or enchantress; whereas, in the past, succubi were generally depicted as frightening and demonic.”

The sex is so intense for us both that in the last few days, as I’ve spent more time as Jenna, I’ve begun to see signs of him physically weakening. He is now on Cialis and topical testosterone, which are helping his stamina to some extent. I’m beginning to think Jenna ghost is not as benign as either of us once thought because when I’m channeling her I’m insatiable! Not that I mind for myself as I’m enjoying the experience. But when I’ve drained Brad and know I should let him rest her control over my libido has me keep going sucking out all his fluids and keeping him erect for hours at a time until he is bordering on Priapism except that I’m continuously stimulating him and his penis is so sore, but neither of us want to stop. When I’m, or is it Jenna who is eventually sated Jenna aura fades and Brad will collapse and fall into a deep sleep of twelve to sixteen hours, which has played havoc his practice of psychiatry.

 

 

 

In thrall to a witch

Me in Jenna’s menstrual size Bloch Alpha pointes

The Photo: a pair of Jenna’s Bloch Alpha pointes that I wear for ballet-sex with Brad, my new psychotherapist. Alpha runs 2 ½ sizes smaller than my street shoe size and I was amazed to find that she had been wearing Alphas to perform in and was using them to play in as well. Her Menstrual size, 5 ½, pictured above should fit me perfectly during my periods. The size she wore during other times in her cycle, 4 ½, are just a tiny bit snug on me with toe pads which I like in a pointe shoe made of conventional materials because they will stretch slightly with wear. Brad wants me to wear her shoes when I’m on my toes while we make love and in a new relationship like this wearing his dead wife’s pointes with her Chi from their love making still very fresh in them is an amazing boost to my libido. Not that I needed one as I get wet, my nipples harden and I need to be milked when ever I’m around him.

My therapy sessions with Brad: As I wrote in my previous post “I think I know what he wants, a hypersexual mate. He lost his wife, Jenna, and baby son in a car accident eighteen months ago and he says I remind him of his wife.  I’m pretty sure he is already in love with me though I have only been seeing him professionally, as his patient, for the past few weeks.”

He is helping me come to terms with being a handmaiden of the Goddess Aphrodite and also being a witch of sorts which is an attribute of being in the service of Venus/Aphrodite. I want to do so much to help others, but there are unforeseeable long term implications in using magic to change things. So he is working with me to channel my energy into helping my wards, my students at St Lucy’s and the men and women who pass through my escort classes make the best possible use of their sexuality skills and wiles as that will bring about an amazing amount of intense pleasure, something an earthly servant of Aphrodite is charged to do.

It took only several small spells to show him I wasn’t certifiably insane or delusional. Things like lighting candles and his fireplace from across the room, levitating a bronze vase and causing a small gentle rain over his office building was all it took to convince him.

In thrall to a witch: Sex with Brad is awesome! He was so ready though he knew it is unethical for a therapist to enter in to an intimate relationship with a patient. I relieved his mind by suggesting that we be friends instead of having a doctor-patient relationship. That way he could analyze and coach me with his knowledge as he learned first hand about my intimate powers. It was the same reasoning I used with all my previous psychoanalysts and it quickly brought him under my spell. We discussed it in a way that left him convinced that it was his idea to analyze me as a friend. It’s so much easier to steer a man in the direction you want when he thinks it’s his idea.

Vagina Dentata: Even so, the first time we were intimate I didn’t let him penetrate me except with his fingers, which for him had its scary moments. But I did let him breast feed since my breasts were full and Jenna had let him breast feed as she had been weaning their son and was already cycling naturally again and using a Milex Omniflex diaphragm for contraception.

It was a great relief to have him milk me and the wonderful time during his gentle breastfeeding helped to allay some of his concern about penetrating me with his penis. I think I may have given too much away when I tightened my muscles around the two fingers he had inserted in my vagina. I squeezed his knuckles together until they hurt just to show him how strong my vaginal muscles are and how easily I can squeeze the cream out of his éclair. He was more than impressed; he was a bit scared and thought I might have Vagina Dentata, an extremely rare (but not mythical) condition where a woman has teeth in her vagina. I had to let him feel around for quite a while to convince him that I had no teeth in my vagina just the normal musculature that had been strengthened by ballet and specialized training to convince him my vagina wasn’t going to crush or eat him.  

Brad is such a deliciously hunky man! In his late 30s he is in great shape with a gorgeous body and he is extremely well endowed (with a beautiful uncut penis) for a psychiatrist and I’ve had sex with quite a few by now. But he still has this teen male wonderment about women and sex. I think his wife was the only woman he had ever had sex with so he is, for all practical purposes, still virgin. Of course he has been thoroughly screened and is free of STIs. Even so he’s blown away that I use only cervical barriers and let him penetrate me w/o him in a condom even when I’m fertile. I’ve assured him I’m perfectly safe and have let him watch me insert my Oves cervical cap and screw it down tight on my fertile cervix.

I know he still thinks, perhaps hopes, he is going to get me preggers and I can tell that is a huge turn-on for him as it has been for many of the men who I have let inseminate me.  I was CD9 and newly fertile more than a week ago when we began our series of intimate penetrative therapy sessions and they have certainly relaxed him in my presence. So sex with him the past week was marvelous! My allowing him penetrative sex was after he permitted me complete access to Jenna’s suite of rooms and all her clothing and other possessions which he had jealously guarded and that had remained untouched since her death.

Gas mask party and a reader's query

A German gas mask made by Drager

The Photo: The photo [above] shows a German Drager, the kind of gas mask typically used here by parking valet services at fetish parties as it has a wide field of view. Because of the heat and the effort to suck air through a working filter canister the filter is usually removed from the canister for parking attendants and security personnel.

A U.S. joint forces MCU2AP-2 gas mask with the comm. Link cord

Bea and gas masks: I had Bea fitted with a relatively late model gas mask so we could crash one of a rival casino’s off-site fetish parties. It’s the same type I currently wear a MCU2AP-2 [shown above] with a tinted lens and comm. unit so we could talk with each other when we split up as we mingled. The canister can be worn on the right or left which is more convenient than a front mounted canister for having missionary sex. In a fetish context empty filter canisters are usually used to complete the look while making it easier to breathe during the intense effort of orgasmic sex. At night and in bright sun it’s almost impossible to see through the tinted lens from the outside to see who is wearing it. I took the invitations from two elite escorts, from the other casinos stable and left them duct taped together in their apartment closet after gassing them with chloroform from a small squirt bottle as they tried on their MCU2AP gas masks w/o the filters screwed on.

I’d been working on my plan for weeks, ever since the party had been advertised to the casino’s list of kinky high rollers. I seduced then copied the girls the apartment key from one of their boyfriends who kept it in a Laddie Caddy he always carries. I took it briefly when he was distracted trying to get in my panties. I told him I needed to check my protection if he didn’t want to use a condom and in the ladies I pressed the key into a wax pad and made an impression. The guy thought his shit didn’t stink and he did have amazing control. I’d watched him work in Naughty’s before; teasing his conquests as they hung in bar slings until they begged him to give them an orgasm. He has a great body, lovely grey eyes, was a good talker and had great stamina, but finally I tired of the game and ripple gripped him just when he thought he had me gasping and pleading for more. It was a covert ripple-grip with me tightening gradually and moving my hips very slightly when he was trying to remain perfectly still and think of his alimony payments (or whatever) to keep from coming in me. He thought he was having a bad night and apologized for filling me with semen when he said he had intended to withdraw. I could feel him swell inside me and his breath go shallow and ragged and his grip on my shoulders tightened before he shot his wad so he knew exactly what he was doing and withdrawal was never in the cards! We parted friends w/o ever exchanging names, him with a big smile on his face and me with the impression of his GF’s apartment key and draining his seed into my thong.

Due diligence: I wasn’t about to expose Bea to a major male sex god w/o taking some precautions. Fortunately birthday boy’s medical records were available to my data mining company. His most recent paternity test occurred only a week or so earlier and showed that he was not only the father, but was free of all known STIs which was a huge relief. If he had been positive I wouldn’t have even mentioned that he would be in town much less arranged a meeting. If necessary there are ways to handle an unintended pregnancy but some STIs are incurable and possibly fatal so it’s a really good idea to know the sexual health of a partner before being intimate with him even if condoms are being used because some infections can be spread w/o genital contact.

The entrance: Bea and I both wore twin-pull back-zip latex catsuits, matching hoods and gloves. The lower pull can be used as a relief zipper providing full access for bodily functions and sex. And of course our gas masks. I would have worn pointes, but that would have given me away as so few other women there had the training or inclination to wear them. So we both wore Louboutin gladiator sandals with 4 inch heels. Expensive but they fit right in. I was so proud of Bea in her heels. She walks in them so gracefully and confidently as though she has been wearing heels for years. I drove a Ford Taurus borrowed from Adolph that had Arizona plates borrowed from a junker in a scrap yard and when we showed our invitations to the gate guard she lowered the hydraulic bollard barrier and I drove on to the estate.

The party: The event was to celebrate the birthday of an A-list rocker who owns a piece of the casino and is into latex, gas masks and fucking very young women, not necessarily in that order. He has left a string of pregnant teens in his wake for years most of them aborting the fruit of his loins except for the one or two who have resorted to suicide. Bea gets wet every time she hears his songs and has most of them on the playlist on her iPod. She so wanted to experience having one of the modern kings of rock fuck her brains out and had fantasized about leaving an assignation with his seed draining into her thong so this seemed to be the perfect opportunity to introduce her clandestinely to A-list sex.

Not that she didn’t plan to give him a good time with her very strong vaginal muscles, but her goal was to have what she calls a ‘cream orgasm’, that is take him bareback with her using only her Reflexions and the silicone based lube DiveGel+ that contains a 4% O9 spermicide for protection. Bea and I are (for now) still in menstrual synchrony and that day we were both CD12 and fertile so it was a risk for her to be mounted bareback by a man with a string of unplanned pregnancies to his credit, but she could use ella (the EC tablet) afterward if it looked as though her diaphragm might have leaked so she was really looking forward to having him spew semen all over the outside of her Reflexions as he thrust into her cervix.

The meeting: Actually, things went really well from Bea’s perspective. There were a lot of women our size with gorgeous bodies wearing latex so she didn’t look or act out of place with her well toned body in a room full of showgirls and escorts and a few high roller women groupies who look uncomfortable in latex. I though Bea was lovely with her toned arms, legs and flat belly sheathed in the polished yellow latex of her suit. None of the women took off their masks, all drinking through their masks drinking straw feature or not hydrating, at least that I saw. I had found out that Bea’s birthday-boy target is particularly fond of the color yellow which why I had her wear that color and it drew the rocker’s attention almost immediately. So after he chatted briefly with a group of women he seemed to know he made his way through the guests to Bea’s side. I was with Bea as he approached and I whispered to her over the comm. link to be demure, let him take the imitative and just to follow his lead.

He looked really sexy with lovely hard thighs a slim waist and broad shoulders shown off in shiny black latex and his Mestel SGE 150 gas mask. He smelled of rubber, latex polish and that marvelous male musk that makes a woman’s pelvis tingle. The lens of his mask was clear and we could see him smile as he said “Welcome little darling” with a plumy Berkshire accent as he twisted the erect nipple of her left breast. Over our comm. link I could hear her gasp and moan softly and begin to wobble in her 4-inch heels while his other hand fondled her groin searching for the pull of her relief zipper. I stepped back, whispering that she should let him continue to lead as he opened the zipper and inserted two fingers. She whispered “Oh God he has his fingers in me feeling the rim of my D.” I just smiled. Everything was going as planned.

I thought he might push her down over the back of one of the couches and take her in front of the rest of his guests, but he withdrew his fingers, rubbed them across his thumb and smiled as he found she was draining copious amounts of her arousal juices. Fortunately her Reflexions was correctly positioned so all her stretchy egg-white fertile cervical mucus was being collected in the dome. He leaned down and touched his mask lens to hers and said “Lets get away from the crowd, there’s a room in the back”, she nodded and he led her away. I was so proud of her! She’d gotten her nerves under control so that her ankles didn’t wobble, her breathing was steady and I loved the way she accentuated the swing of her rubber sheathed hips as she moved toward their penetrative encounter.

She told me afterward that once in the room he opened her zipper further giving him full access and commented that he loved hairless pussies as she had been waxed four days earlier in preparation for offering herself to him. She said that he asked her to open his relief zipper and help him out of his athletic cup so she knelt and eased his penis and balls out of his cup holding his reproductive future gently in her hands. Caressing him she found he was uncut and loved watching as his glans appeared as he lengthened and his foreskin rolled back letting his thick erection glisten from the pre-ejaculate he was already producing. She said she could smell the musky scent of semen, latex and a scented condom lube through the empty filter canister so she knew she wouldn’t be his first of the day. She said she really wanted to suck him off but didn’t want to take her mask off so she could be identified later.

Penetration:  After he was erect it went quickly. She was pleased to find that he wasn’t as long as she had feared, but he was wonderfully thick which she loves. She thought he would mount her while lying on the bed. Instead he reached behind her put his hands under her firm high buttocks and lifted her off the floor. She spread her legs and guided him to her entrance then wrapped her legs around his waist. With her arms around his neck he moved them across the room and placed her so her back was against the wall and pushed at the same time she tightened her legs around his waist. With a single powerful thrust he penetrated her as far as he could go and their pelvises hit with a solid and rather painful thud. I could hear what was happening over Bea’s comm. link. They gasped simultaneously, she from him compressing her clit when their pelvises slammed together and he as he as he murmured “Oh My God you are so tight! How did you get to be this tight?” And she murmured back, “I’m a ballet dancer; you should feel my grip when I’m taken on my toes.” His hands under her rubber sheathed bum supporting her weight he rapidly drilled her with powerful strokes. It was all lust and no gentleness on his part, but she was so turned on having his thick unsheathed piston pumping inside her that she came twice before he got off splattering a few milliliters of molten pearl against the protective latex membrane of her diaphragm. Their encounter had lasted less then five minutes after he entered her.

Afterglow: Still hard inside her he held her against the wall and leaned against her while they enjoyed the afterglow from their physical exertions as their breathing returned to normal and sweat drained into their suits and masks. Bea was pleased that the splatter mask lenses she was wearing prevented the sweat from burning her eyes as it was the first time she had worn them for protection during a sexual encounter. She said she thought about ripple gripping him as she felt him going soft inside her, but decided not to because she didn’t want him to think she was that experienced. He lowered her gently to the floor and they rearranged their respective parts, zipped up their suits and he walked her back into the main room with the rest of his guests.

Bea knew the drill, we were to leave immediately she had gotten what she came for so we said our goodbyes to the rocker and headed for the door. He was surprised that we were leaving so early, but Bea told him we couldn’t stay longer because “We need to make the three AM bed-check at the convent.” We walked out of the house at 2:15 AM and were out the gate five minutes later. No one checks guests leaving a party.

An enquiring reader asks: You mentioned that Bea "has become a much greater risk taker than is good for someone of her age and experience." I'm curious, what risks has she been taking? What aggressive acts need moderation?

Given the effort required to obtain a death rubber for a girl of her age and the risks involved in having her harvest and learn to use it I thought that rather than answer this query in a comment, I would reply in a post where more people can form an opinion of Bea and how she approaches challenges.

She has shown up for training with escort candidates w/o having her diaphragm inserted. She did have her slit kit with her, but in training we have a strict protocol that any time a student is around a man she trains with she should have her diaphragm correctly placed with fresh spermicide in the dome. Returning readers will recall Bea is not on hormones and right now her uterus is too small to comfortably wear even a GyneFix IUD. So a diaphragm is her sole method of contraception since condoms are not worn for training in order for the girls to become confident that the contraception they are using will protect them. Granted this is a bit riskier for Bea in the near but a St Lucy’s girl in her circumstances and with her libido is expected to suck it up and be obsessive about her diaphragm wearing routine would stand her in good stead.

Worse, she has appeared for dive-sex classes w/o her diaphragm inserted for contraception and flood insurance. She wasn’t able to get into the pool area as the dressing room door to the pool wouldn’t open because the scanner detected the RFID chip in her diaphragm wasn’t behind her pelvic bone. Given that she has no other form of contraception at the moment, that she was approaching her fertile interval and she wouldn’t have been protected from having water forced into her uterus by the hydraulics of her partner’s thrusts if her vagina flooded, that was very reckless behavior.

I think wearing her very own death rubber that she harvested herself the former owner’s Chi will cause her to become more grounded and responsible. That has been the effect wearing a series of death rubbers has had on me regardless of how sexually irresponsible the previous owner had been. I can’t stress enough the additional confidence and greater perspective having any of my death rubbers inserted gives me so I’m certain that Bea’s perspective will benefit from her wearing one. It will be an amazing learning experience for her melding sex and life lessons from women much older and experienced than her.

   

Death rubber, Chi and Trimix

OTS Guardian FFM with ambient breathing valve and comm. unit

Bea’s dive training: Bea’s academic work has her on the dean’s list so she shouldn’t have any problem with finals in a few weeks. Now that summer is approaching I had our divemaster qualify her for recreational diving with Trimix so she can dive to the bottom of Adolph’s deep water training facility with me. I wouldn’t let her near Adolph alone because she is just his type, but he has the only heated deep water pool, it’s a bit more than 200 ft deep, where we can go to the bottom in bikinis or nude and she should be safe with me. She sometimes wears contacts to change her eye color so I had her fitted with a ‘splatter mask’ to add to her Slit Kit. Returning readers may remember that a splatter mask is a pair of very large gas permeable soft contact lenses of the latest silicone formulation worn to minimize the effects of having semen splattered in the eyes during a sexual encounter. A splatter mask is also useful for keeping sweat out of the eyes while SCUBA diving.

Electronic medical records and death rubber: I mentioned in an earlier post that its difficult finding new latex death rubber cervical barriers as my old ones wear out. Returning readers will recall that a ‘death rubber’ is a cervical barrier (diaphragm or cervical cap) that was being worn when the woman died while having sex. Almost all are diaphragms as the only cap now generally available is FemCap which can be worn comfortably while swimming, but is subject to squeeze when worn while diving to any appreciable depth. Almost all escorts using cervical barriers wear latex Reflexions flat spring diaphragms even though they must be avoided by women with latex allergy, don’t last as long as silicone and for some women can contribute to UTIs. Reflexions is so popular because of latex superior heat transfer properties, the softer stretchier dome and the fact that it is very difficult for even the most skilled man to intentionally under-thrust the rim. But for dive-sex Reflexions is a must because it’s the only diaphragm that can be effectively worn as flood insurance below ten meters since its flat spring rim will not distort due to water pressure. My size is an 80mm, but Bea takes the smallest size, a 65mm so as death rubber they can be extremely difficult to find.

Fortunately most reproductive health clinics and pharmacies in this area have converted their paper medical records to electronic ones on-line. There is no way I would have been able to track the fitting and sale of diaphragms by myself so I hired a data mining company to collect and format the information in a form I can use to see which practitioners are performing fittings, who is being fitted with what and where they are buying their diaphragms and caps. Not surprisingly our clinic fits and sells a significant percentage and I recognize the names of all of our trainees and our casino’s (Pirate’s) stable of elite escorts who are all fitted with Reflexions there. I also recognized the names of the girls who flow through Adolph’s training facility and use Reflection for flood insurance most of whom end up working as Towel-Girls at Splash, his underwater sex club, where the turnover of girls is quite high.

I was pleased that Adolph’s girls appeared in the inventory because they are less experienced, take the greatest risks and are far more likely to have serious accidents making them likely candidates for death rubber harvesting. Also making Adolph’s girls a rich hunting ground for a death rubber for Bea is that a surprising percentage of them have purchased 65mm Reflexions. I had fitted a lot of the girls and I knew that for many a 65mm was much too small to provide a proper fit when worn for flood insurance. Then it occurred me that they were wearing that size in order to offer a masochistic experience to clients wanting penis torture from ramming the rim. It’s also very uncomfortable for the woman to have a too small flat spring rim rammed by a client’s penis and in dive gear on the bottom of an encounter pool it can be claustrophobic, which may help explain the high turnover in Splash Towel Girls.

Chi and Me: In traditional Chinese culture, qì (also chi or ch'i) is an active principle forming part of any living thing. Qi is frequently translated as "life energy", "life force", or "energy flow". Qi is the central underlying principle in traditional Chinese medicine and martial arts. The literal translation of "qi" is "breath", "air", or "gas".

I use the anglicized form ‘Chi' to stand for the portion of a woman’s life force that remains with her diaphragm if she dies during intercourse while wearing it. One summer in Montreal years ago, working as a latex model when the ballet Co. I was with was on hiatus, I discovered wearing other women’s diaphragms (don’t ask, it’s complicated) was a huge turn-on. When I accidentally wore the keepsake Ortho All-Flex of a roommate’s dead sister killed during her rape I was fascinated to find a portion of her life force was still in the diaphragm. With more experience I found that seemed to occur only when the previous owner died during sex. Not only that but that element of the dead woman’s Chi combines with my own while I wear her diaphragm giving me greater confidence and assertiveness as well as practical knowledge from the former owner’s life experiences. If I wear a particular death rubber frequently enough, after about ten or twelve times, I become able to mentally experience more details from the former owner’s life as I become more comfortable with her Chi. It’s to the point now that I can recall the previous owner’s sexual encounters had with lovers while wearing the diaphragm I have inserted. So far I have avoided recalling the encounter during which she died thinking I might not survive the experience.

Bea and Chi: By equipping Bea with death rubber diaphragms of her own I’m going to try to moderate her attitude about men from sexual aggression to sexual assertiveness using the previous owner’s Chi. Chi moderation has worked very well for me to curb some extremely dangerous behaviors so I’m hoping it will work for Bea because since she participated in the private coaching sessions with Brian she has become a much greater risk taker than is good for someone of her age and experience.

Bea’s social education begins

A C-string invisible thong panty

The photo: The C-string panty eliminates panty lines in tight skirts and slacks and covers the head of a Penetrator plug when the wearer is performing on stage in pasties and C-string with her plug inserted.

Bea becomes my protégé: Now that I’ve taken a personal interest in her I’ve arranged for her to stay with me for training over the summer holiday as her mom is now in an acute care facility. As my protégé she will be taught all I know about seduction then be presented into society to make the most of her considerable talents. I’ll love watching her cutting a swathe through the men in society breaking hearts and mind-fucking contenders left and right as her favors are competed for. She definitely has a seriously kinky side so one of the first things is to find her a 65mm Reflexions death rubber as I’ve found the Chi of the former owner can be a huge confidence boost when I’m feeling tentative.

Bea, her Reflexions and ‘cervical grip’: Returning readers will remember that I recently wrote about fitting Bea with her first latex diaphragm, a 65mm flat spring Reflexions. The advantages of wearing a flat spring latex diaphragm are better heat transfer characteristics and it’s nearly impossible to under-thrust. Under-thrust protection is very important since she is too small for an IUD and she will be continuing her training encounters with escort candidates and possibly Brian. Also with Reflexions, on the sensual side there is the marvelous feeling that I’ll call ‘cervical grip’ when wearing it with the dome under significant vacuum while diving or pumped down in a hyperbaric chamber under positive pressure.

I hadn’t had the opportunity to take her to Adolph’s multi-bed hyperbaric chamber to see if the seal of her Reflexions was good enough that the dome would hold a strong vacuum to sustain her cervical grip until she broke the seal. Though she has deep soft vaginal rugae and it seemed to me that the rim should seal well enough to develop and retain a strong vacuum you can’t tell for sure until the individual actually puts her diaphragm under vacuum.

It wasn’t the best time for either of us since we were both on our periods. I was CD1 and flowing lightly and she was CD5 and over her heavy days for the month. But I had a patient from The Lorelei, who I was going to try and fit for a high-vac dome so time in the chamber was available and we took it. We emptied our diaphragms then reinserted making sure that they were positioned correctly and were comfortable. Then I had the chamber operator take us down slowly to 100 feet as we adjusted to the pressure and the air was squeezed out of the domes and the latex membranes were stretched over our cervixes and into our anterior fornices. Bea loved the feeling. She said it was as though her uterus was being gently pushed higher inside her, which indeed it was, slightly. It’s somewhat the same feeling a woman gets when she wears a pessary for a minor uterine prolapse, minus the pain and other side effects associated with the prolapse.

Bea kitted out for underwater sex: Now that I have more control over her training I had her kitted out for dive-sex. Fortunately she is already PADI open water qualified which saves us a world of time as we can get straight to diving with male escorts. That will be a help to the men, having Bea in their rotation as there aren’t that many St Lucy’s girls who are interested in sex underwater even in a properly equipped and well heated pool. I’ll admit a girl does have to be adventuresome and have a raging libido to enjoy dive-sex so Bea should fit right in.

I had our divemaster fit her with an Oceans Technology Systems Guardian full face mask (OTS Guardian FFM) with an ambient breathing valve (abv) that saves air when on the surface and a comm. Link so she can talk to her dive partner while under water. But the really practical thing about FFMs for dive-sex is that during orgasm you don’t have to worry about losing your reg if you open your mouth to scream which, at least for women, lets us forget about equipment and just enjoy sucking gas and our partner’s thrust technique.

Pool pointes, silicone toe-shoes with replaceable satin ribbons, come in standard U.S. women’s shoe sizes so there was no problem in having her fitted at Gepetto’s fetish shoe amd; boot boutique. The pointes came with a full set of lead platform weights from one to twenty pounds in two pound increments. Returning readers will remember the weights can be screwed onto the platforms of the buoyancy neutral shoes to hold the wearer in the vertical position under water or with the heavier weights on the bottom like a divers lead weighted boots.

Brian and the Mumps: I haven’t heard from Brian for almost a month. Callisto called today to say that he had had a very bad case of Mumps and wondered where he had gotten it since no one in his classes at the university have had it recently. I’m fairly certain that I know where he contracted it, from one of his St Lucy’s Muses though none of them presented any symptoms of the virus. A significant percentage of cases are asymptomatic and St Lucy’s did have a few presenting cases about that time even though we had all been inoculated with the measles-mumps-rubella (MMR) vaccine. Callisto said that his testicles had become swolen and very painful and that he seems to be taking a very long time to recover. Side effects are rare but can be very serious in adults. I have no way t prove it but he spent so much time privately coaching Bea that I think he probably got it from her even though she presented no symptoms and seemed in top physical condition during their repeated sexual encounters. Callisto said he has revised his schedule to cancel all travel for the rest of the academic year, which is a relief since I hadn’t decided exactly how I was going to prevent Brian privately coaching Bea as he said he intended to do and still keep him happy.

Prentif crush depth side effects.

The cervix on cycle day 7, just past menses

The photo: taken on CD7 it shows a healthy symmetrical cervix perfectly shaped for the effective use of a Prentif cavity rim cervical cap.

Dive-sex and a Prentif Death Rubber: I was fortunate to be able to recently check off another of the cervical barriers (in my size) I harvest from the bodies of women who die during a sexual encounter. Returning readers will remember I call the protective rubber clothing, shoes and devices harvested from those women ‘death rubber.’ I especially love to wear a death rubber cervical barrier. Because it provided intimate protection to its former owner I feel it contains far more of the Chi of the woman who was wearing it when she died. The dead woman’s Chi combined with my own increases my libido amazingly.

I was lucky to happen upon a 23 y/o woman, a well-bred Brit-Chick rubberist with a plumy Berkshire accent, who had a Prentif. Lucky because Prentif have been discontinued for more than seven years and amazingly it was a 25mm which is my size! Actually, the woman from whom I harvested my Prentif death rubber found me since she was a guest at The Lorelei, Adolph’s spa in the hills outside town. She was interested in rough dive-sex and I had been recommended to her as a fitter for a barrier to be use as a gas-guard/flood insurance, because she wanted to experience a rough underwater sexual encounter. For contraception she was ‘on the jab’ as she called it, the Depo-subQ Provera 104 injection so she had no concern about an unplanned pregnancy.

I gave her a thorough pelvic and fit her with a Reflexions 75mm flat spring latex diaphragm. After her diaphragm fitting she asked if I thought she was a good candidate for a Prentif cavity rim cervical cap because she had purchased a 25mm from a midwifery supply store. I asked how she had determined the size and she said she bought the smallest size they had. Sigh! During her pelvic I saw she had a lovely smooth and symmetrical cervix which would be ideal for wearing a Prentif so we broke the seal on the box took the 25mm cap out of its case and I inserted it slipping it on to her cervix and screwed it down tight. The cavity in the rim established a strong suction on the cervical wall gripping her cervix and the dome dimpled, as it should, indicating there was a strong vacuum in the dome. She was so lucky! It fit perfectly! She was delighted because she liked the idea of the dome being an extension of her cervix making it easier for a partner to ram, which as a sexual masochist she enjoyed. I knew exactly what she meant as I’m that way myself! I cautioned her that if she wanted her partner to ram the dome she should be sure to turn the tab on the shoulder of the rim so that it faced her posterior fornix so it wouldn’t hurt her partner and had her reach in while pushing down and turn the tab to the back herself.

Diving the Prentif: Some women can take more pressure on their cervix than others and there is no way to know which is which until they pressure test a cervical cap either on a dive or preferably in a hyperbaric chamber, but the HC option is unlikely because there are almost no hyperbaric facilities available for that sort of testing. Some women seem to delight in having the cervix gripped tightly while others can’t stand even having a Prentif’s cavity rim sucking on the base of their cervix. So when I fitted my patient with the Prentif - before I’d done my hyperbaric chamber research about diving cervical caps and found the crush depth of a Prentif was approximately 30 feet - I already had my suspicions that if the cap wasn’t forced off the cervix when the dome was compressed by the increased pressure it would squeeze her cervix so tightly she’d probably be unable to function from pain and nausea. So I cautioned her not to go too deep because there is a tipping point where the discomfort seems manageable or perhaps even enjoyable at depth and then a few feet deeper the pain suddenly becomes unbearable. I’ve tried taking 800mg of ibuprofen before a HC test dive to see if it upped my pain threshold and it did marginally, but only enough to give me time to try to ascend to get away from the pain if I’d gone too far. I’ve found that for me other than the pain, which I enjoy, there is no warning. One minute I’m doing fine. The next I’m having terrible cramps and vomiting, which when diving can be fatal.

An opportunity: So, a few days later I got a call from Adolph. A guest at The Lorelei has had an incident during a BDSM dive encounter he said and he needs my help tidying up loose ends. I got to the Spa to find the guest still at the bottom of her suites encounter pool. It was one of the new suites with the 40 ft deep pools. She was dressed all in black; a rubber catsuit, weighted pool-pointes, hood, gloves and a FFM with a short tank so it wouldn’t impair her partner’s access when penetrating her from the rear. She was wearing a buoyancy compensator and when I got there the body was in the fetal position on its side with it’s legs drawn up to the chest in a locked metal cage on the bottom with a cable and hook connected to the top that ran to a winch suspended above the surface of the pool.

It was obvious to me that Adolph had been the partner of the woman in the cage when or shortly before she got in trouble. He had often fantasized to me about that sort of dungeon set-up, but I hadn’t known he had actually built it. He said they had sex in the cage at15 feet below the surface and everything was fine then he had left her to raise the cage and the winch gearbox failed and the cage went all the way to the bottom. He wanted me to go down and retrieve the body. I just laughed and said he better call an mechanic because there was no way I was going in that cage underwater unless he was in a straight jacket and sedated. He just smiled and said I knew him too well then took the remote out of his pocket and raised the cage and swung it on to the pool deck.

The body: She was totally encased in rubber except for her vulva that was showing through the open relief zipper. I hit the quick release latches on her FFM spider and pulled off her mask. The oral nasal unit was filled with vomit and the stench of gastric juices nearly made me gag. She has suffocated, drowning in her own vomit. Her face was twisted in fear and pain, but I still recognized her as my 25mm Prentif patient of a few days earlier. Her wrists had been restrained with zip-ties and fastened to the bottom strap that held her air tank on its backboard. At first I didn’t understand why her hands had been tied and then I realized it was so she couldn’t reach the Prentif I was almost certain she was wearing. It was just the sort of diabolical thing Adolph would do; place a woman he just had sex with in a situation where as her depth increased so did her pain. Was it an accident and he hadn’t intended to kill her just to apply exquisite torture using her own reproductive tract? Or, did he want to see what happened regardless of the consequences?

Benefit analysis: I am certain that the HD video of the Prentif-girl encounter will be a dive snuff-porn best seller for rubberiest as well as dive-sex fetishists in Europe and Asia. I did my usual vaginal search of the corpse and found she was indeed wearing the 25mm Prentif I’d first screwed onto her cervix. It took me several minutes to glove-up push her uterus down where I could easily reach her cervix and get two fingers under the rim to break the vacuum and pop it off her cervix. It was full of blood and pieces of endometrium, but hadn’t come loose. The cap itself seemed to have survived in good condition. I could hardly wait to try wearing it myself! I cleaned it well and sterilized it by soaking it in alcohol then checked it closely again to make certain there was no damage to the rubber so I have my first Prentif death rubber! I’m wearing it as I write this and I like to think the previous owner has contributed to this entry. I realize there are severe depth limitations to diving a Prentif, but the surge in my sex drive from her Chi make it a must-wear to residential pool parties where pools used for encounters are no more than 15 feet deep.

Adolph says that the woman had left an Advanced Medical Directive and a will (she told him she had no family) to the affect that if something happened to her while training at the spa her body should be cremated and her ashes scattered in the desert. The coroner ruled she ‘died by misadventure’ when it was found from her medical records that she had a known history of seizures, which she hadn’t listed on the required medical questionnaire at The Lorelei before being allowed to dive nor had her seizure history been on the history she gave our clinic before I fit her barriers. Personally, I’m convinced that the pain got continually worse from the dome squeezing her cervix as she sank below a depth of 25 feet until it caused uterine cramping so severe that she vomited as a side effect of diving her Prentif too deep.