Friday, November 25, 2011

Underwater encounters and heel height as an economic indicator

Divemaster in ‘The Pit’ Thanksgiving weekend

Dive-sex and Nitrox:
The two most common recreational diving Nitrox mixes contain 32% (Nitrox I) and 36% oxygen (Nitrox II), which have maximum operating depths (MODs) of 34 metres (112 ft) and 29 metres (95 ft) respectively. We had all the dive computers set up by our Divemaster so even the teens could safely use Nitrox II at the bottom of my 68 ft deep pool, The Pit. At a max depth of 68 feet there should be little danger of oxygen toxicity while using 36% oxygen gas to reduce nitrogen loading and so extend bottom time for underwater sexual encounters. This has worked extremely well and we all had at least one bottom encounter before breakfast.

Sexual Safeguards for women divers: During a very sexually active weekend involving dive-sex and multiple partners, in addition to wearing a gas-guard, it’s important to use a good waterproof vaginal lube and a biocide to prevent friction lesions in the vaginal walls as well as minimizing the likelihood of developing Candida or Bacterial Vaginosis (BV) caused by having the vaginal pH upset by several different sets of bacteria introduced into the vagina by multiple partners. Use of DiveGel+ a combination of a silicone gel lube, O9 spermicide and biocide reduces the chances of a vaginal infection from over use and multiple partners. Staying well hydrated is extremely important so you don’t have a heat stroke during a dive. It’s amazing how dehydrating dive-sex can be for a woman. Water pressure squeezes out body fluids into our urine and a well endowed male thrusting into our G-spots with the bladder directly behind it means we frequently urinate during dive-sex as well as lose fluid by perspiring from the physical exertion, increased blood pressure and respiration, during thrusting and orgasms, so we all carry a bottle of spring water and have a long drink before diving. There is a ritual of vaginal prep that experienced women divers should go through in the morning before dive-sex. After emptying our bowels and bladders we insert our gas-guards and apply a 10 mg applicator of DiveGel+ in the vagina and we are good to go to start our day. Of course none of these precautions guard against contracting an STI so I carefully screen all my guests by requiring them to take and pass a full STI panel.

While the men watched the parades and played poker most of the women (except Diané, Cara and Adèle who aren’t really into dance any more) took our morning ballet class, which I led as well as took myself. Before we showered the men wanted fetish sex with the dancers taken balanced en pointe in toe-shoes. After class, while we are warmed up and supple and the adrenaline is still flowing is a great time for ballet-sex and we all changed into Gaynors so we didn’t have to work so much to stay over our blocks while being penetrated from behind. Diané, Cara and Adèle wore five inch stilettos – stripper heels - which kept them on three-quarter pointe and simulated, after a fashion, pointe-sex. It was a marvelous morning!

Cyndi’s mom: Cyndi’s mom Fiona and her partner Maj. Colin Tree flew in from Washington DC this morning to spend the long weekend. She is usually involved with lobbying congress but is currently finishing preparations for a visit of senior UK ministers to discuss joint sovereign debt reduction. Fiona and Colin both love dive-sex and Fiona currently favors a latex Prentif (28mm) cervical cap as a gas-guard and loves how Colin can ram the dome of her Prentif so hard that when she wants to remove it she has to pry it off her cervix by breaking the vacuum in the dome using a crochet needle with a 10mm hook.

Adolph’s secret ingredient: As I mentioned in an earlier post he was going to do Adolph brought a special meat for the gravy. It’s only in the last several years, since Germans have risen in power at the Vatican, that Adolph has had access to this scarce ingredient, fresh human testicles. He had managed to obtain the gonads of an entire entering class of ten young boys, when they were castrated shortly after disappearing into service in a secret monastic society’s choral school. Finely diced and broiled in sweet butter then added to the roast turkey drippings, broth from the gizzard, liver, and neck along with flour and thickened to taste the tender morsels of meat melt in the mouth. And, it is said that for women who consume them there is an amazing increase the libido, which is why the supply of castrato’s testicles is so prized by church officials who feed them (sparingly) to their mistresses.

The delicacy was packed in dry ice and ‘Limnaea’ (my G550) stopped in Milan to pick it up on the way back from ferrying couriers to and from the Near East. Adolph had his lab check the meat for all known STIs and organ borne pathogens since neither he nor I are interested in getting Creutzfeldt-Jacob Disease no matter how delicious the meal. All the meat was disease free which since it came from 9 y/o boys you would hope would be the case. I haven’t told my guests what Adolph brought to share with us nor of the possible effect consuming it might have on the ladies in the group. I want to see if I can notice any difference in the sexual behavior of my women guests before I say anything. Last night they all seemed more amorous even the ones like Diané and Cara who are far less sexually assertive. I felt friskier than usual, but given that I knew that the Castrati gonads were supposed to be an aphrodisiac my opinion of my own performance is suspect.

The New York Times
Heel Height Times Tweets?


THE 1920s notion of a “hemline index,” in which the economist George Taylor posited that skirt lengths rise and fall in relation to the economy, suggests that fashion is socially determined. In a modern twist, a report about the direction of high heels, issued by I.B.M., proposes that fashion can now be determined through social media.

To promote its software and consulting services, I.B.M. announced that its computer analysis of “billions of social media posts” pointed to a downward trend in heel heights. This was surprising, the company said, because heels usually go up during an economic downturn.

While an intriguing thesis, it bears some fact-checking.

First, I.B.M.’s case: By mapping the most influential participants in online conversations about shoes, the company was then able to eavesdrop on a dozen key bloggers. It found that the median heel heights mentioned on those sites dropped to two inches this year from seven inches in 2009.

But did women really wear seven-inch heels in 2009? Is that physically possible?

Trevor Davis, who led the I.B.M. survey, argued: “The absolute number is not really what is of great interest here. It is the relevant movement.”

There is, indeed, anecdotal evidence of a decline in heel height, but mixed opinions about whether that has anything to do with the economy. Colleen Sherin, the senior fashion director of Saks Fifth Avenue, wasn’t buying it. Yes, flats are going to be big for spring, but so are wedges.

“I know that people like to take an economic read from heel heights, skirt lengths and selling red lipsticks,” she said, “but it is just the cycle of fashion.”

Elizabeth Semmelhack, the senior curator at the Bata Shoe Museum in Toronto, has proposed that heels grow higher in a bad economy, citing the introduction of platforms during the Great Depression and their reappearance during the oil crisis in the 1970s and again during the dot-com bust. But even that was a “casual observation,” not gospel, she said.

Valerie Steele, the chief curator at the Museum at F.I.T., said the evidence does not hold up, even if people are talking about it online.

“You can have absolutely vertiginous heels and, at the same time, sell billions of ballet flats,” Ms. Steele said. “It all goes back to that Mark Twain quote: ‘Lies, damned lies and statistics.’ ”

Personal comment: Seven inch heels? The IBM computer must have been programmed to search fetish sites and even then there are only a few of us who can actually wear ballet-boots or pointe shoes, the heelless ultimate in high heels, to walk around en pointe confidently in them. I tend to agree with Valerie Steele. However, I will say that in 2008 when the stock market went into free-fall the number of senior business men who sought to escape the economy by immersing themselves in pointe shoe and ballet-boot sexual fantasies available in Vegas skyrocketed so it became difficult to find enough elite talent to service the demand for ballet-sex. The demand has decreased now, but it is still 20% above it’s 2007 peak. Of course that is demand on the male side not involving fashionable heel height, skirt length or lipstick colors.

1 comment:

  1. It seems you had a very fun Thanksgiving between ballet- and dive-sex. I noticed the other day there was a comparison, I think it as in Men's Health magazine, about comparison of different lubes. I noticed they did mention silicone-based lubes, so as I was reading this entry, I did a quick Yahoo! search about it, and I noticed there is an article about different market silicone lubes.

    The address is, so you might want to take a look and give some opinion as to how those brands might compare with your DiveGel+.


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Powys , Wales, United Kingdom
I'm a classically trained dancer and SAB grad. A Dance Captain and go-to girl overseeing high-roller entertainment for a major casino/resort